Dr. Karp mentions that the Child rearing in Tertian is done by the entire village...
In the article, Dr. Karp mentions that the Child rearing in Tertian is done by the entire village and not by their own biological parents. Moreover the children speaks about their own parents rather than the other adults in the village was observed by Dr. Karp in his research. This contradicts the conclusion of Dr. Field and proves that conclusion provided by him about Tertian Village is invalid. However, before Dr. Karp proves the research wrong it must be properly evaluated, where 2 questions must be answered.
Dr. Field as per his research states that the child rearing is done by the village people. Dr. Field does not states “why the child rearing is done by the village people”? When Dr. field visited the village, may be the people in the village consists of less adults and more senior citizens. In that case the children living in the village are been brought up the village people the senior citizens and the biological parents go to the work. It is assumed that may be the village consists of one ancient family and the people in the village in that case are all one whole family. In that case the child rearing can be done by the village as they are the part of the family and helping the family to grow together in an efficient manner. Further, in Dr. Karp’s interview it is observed that the children are speaking more about their biological parents than the adults in the village. This might be because being away from them due to the work make them miss them and so they are talking about them. If either of these scenarios has merit, then the conclusion drawn by Dr. Karp is the article is significantly weaken.
Further, there is a possibility that the children don’t have the parents and are orphan or the whole village is an orphan village. In that case the biological parents cannot rear the child as they have either abandon the child or they are not alive anymore. Also this might be the only option to raise the children who have been left by their parents. However, in both Dr.Karp and Dr. Field case they have not mentioned why exactly the children are rear by the village people. If the above assumption is true then may be since the children didn’t get to be with their parents and don’t know what it feels to have parents makes them to talk about them. If above is true, then the argument does not hold the water.
In the conclusion, the argument, as it stands now, is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions as the rearing done by the village people might not be good enough and so Dr. Karp got to see the different side of the story. However more evidences need to be provided.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 481 350
No. of Characters: 2131 1500
No. of Different Words: 180 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.683 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.43 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.229 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.905 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.011 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.373 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.523 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.185 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In the article, Dr. Karp mentions that t...
^^^^
Line 1, column 144, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...nd not by their own biological parents. Moreover the children speaks about their own par...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d, where 2 questions must be answered. Dr. Field as per his research states tha...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 120, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'state'
Suggestion: state
... the village people. Dr. Field does not states “why the child rearing is done by the v...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 263, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun adults is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...e the people in the village consists of less adults and more senior citizens. In tha...
^^^^
Line 2, column 722, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an efficient manner" with adverb for "efficient"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...and helping the family to grow together in an efficient manner. Further, in Dr. Karp’s interview it is...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1118, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'weakened'.
Suggestion: weakened
...r. Karp is the article is significantly weaken. Further, there is a possi...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s the article is significantly weaken. Further, there is a possibility that the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 270, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...he child or they are not alive anymore. Also this might be the only option to raise ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 384, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Karp
...t by their parents. However, in both Dr.Karp and Dr. Field case they have not mentio...
^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... the argument does not hold the water. In the conclusion, the argument, as it s...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 268, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...to see the different side of the story. However more evidences need to be provided.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, talking about
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 36.0 19.6327345309 183% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 16.3942115768 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2190.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 477.0 441.139720559 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.59119496855 5.12650576532 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.67336384929 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32054354873 2.78398813304 83% => OK
Unique words: 190.0 204.123752495 93% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.398322851153 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 666.9 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.2537416664 57.8364921388 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 104.285714286 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7142857143 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.71428571429 5.70786347227 48% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 12.0 5.25449101796 228% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.67664670659 278% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0198446222536 0.218282227539 9% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.00998835220372 0.0743258471296 13% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0446692690215 0.0701772020484 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0100301009554 0.128457276422 8% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0173726444598 0.0628817314937 28% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.3799401198 80% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 48.3550499002 137% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.64 12.5979740519 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.11 8.32208582834 85% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 98.500998004 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 16.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.