The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.
"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend
is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey,
players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with
an extensive advertising campaign directed at people ten to twenty-five years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that
the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these
assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the editorial, it is stated that the sales of Whirlwind video games will drastically increase in the upcoming months. The author came to this conclusion based on the fact that, Whirlwind introduced games with high graphics quality and conducted widespread advertising campaign. However, the author's conclusion is predicated upon several unwarranted assumptions that, if not substantiated, dramatically weakens the persuasiveness of the argument. Thus the following three assumptions must be addressed.
Firstly, the author presumes that gamers prefer games with lifelike graphics that require high configuration devices. But this may not be necessarily true. Perhaps only a few gamers have the luxury to buy High-configuration computers as the GPUs that come with them are really expensive. It is possible that the majority of the gamers can't afford these devices. Indeed, even if the gamers have the opulence to buy these gaming accessories there is a potential that they don't like such embellished, over-elaborate, intricately designed games. They might still be attached to classic & simple games that they have been enjoying over the past. If either of these cases are true, the author's claim that the Whirldwind's recently introduced games will be preferred by gamers does not hold water.
Second of all, in the business magazine editorial, the author claims that the video games sales trend is going to have an upward trajectory. However this may not be the case. Since games which contains immaculate graphics requires skilled game developers, artists, VFX team, story writer and many more, making such game needs a huge investment. Perhaps the salary of these employees and production cost reaches to such an extent that, even if the sales reach millions this will hardly meet up the expenses of the investors. It is possible that one or two of these top quality games become a flop and, that company incur a massive loss which might discourage other game development companies to make such lifelike games. If either of these cases is true, then the author's contention that gaming companies will see an upward sales trend is significantly weakened.
Finally, even if it is true that futuristic games will be accepted by the gamers and video gaming companies will have enough resource to produce these demanding pieces of art, the author assumes that Whirlwind's newly introduced game will be accepted among the gaming community. But this may prove unwarranted. It is likely that new games urge the ardent gamers to give them a try. It is possible that these games are Whirldwind's first lifelike graphics game and they are inexperienced in this genre of games. There is a possibility that these games might not fulfill the expectations of eagerly waiting gamers and thus refuse to buy games from this company in future. Furthermore, perhaps the advertising campaigns were not directed to the proper age-group gamers as these lifelike games may be too realistic, non-fictional and over-exacting to the younger population. Thus, the matured taste might be unaware of Whirlwind's game even though they are keen to play them. If it is true that Whirlwind's game can't fulfill the expectation of its fans, then the author's assertion is invalid and his prediction that the company will see increased sales is little likely to happen.
In conclusion, the author may have come to a sound conclusion and Whirlwind video games might achieve their expected sales. However, as it stand now, the argument relies on three unwarranted assumptions that renders its conclusion unpersuasive at best and specious/fallacious at worst. If the author is able to provide addition evidences for these three assumptions, then it will be possible to fully evaluate the validity of the argument that whether sales of Whirldwind video games will expand in the upcoming months.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 28 15
No. of Words: 621 350
No. of Characters: 3184 1500
No. of Different Words: 279 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.992 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.127 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.778 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 220 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 165 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 128 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 82 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.179 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.427 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.786 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.294 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.461 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 295, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...read advertising campaign. However, the authors conclusion is predicated upon several u...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 450, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ens the persuasiveness of the argument. Thus the following three assumptions must be...
^^^^
Line 1, column 506, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng three assumptions must be addressed. Firstly, the author presumes that gamers...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 337, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ossible that the majority of the gamers cant afford these devices. Indeed, even if t...
^^^^
Line 3, column 472, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...essories there is a potential that they dont like such embellished, over-elaborate, ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 143, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... is going to have an upward trajectory. However this may not be the case. Since games w...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 765, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...either of these cases is true, then the authors contention that gaming companies will s...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 659, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...s refuse to buy games from this company in future. Furthermore, perhaps the advertising c...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1006, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...hem. If it is true that Whirlwinds game cant fulfill the expectation of its fans, th...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1057, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...l the expectation of its fans, then the authors assertion is invalid and his prediction...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, really, second, so, still, then, thus, in conclusion, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 13.6137724551 191% => OK
Pronoun: 63.0 28.8173652695 219% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3250.0 2260.96107784 144% => OK
No of words: 619.0 441.139720559 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.25040387722 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.98795655647 4.56307096286 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87108553582 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 283.0 204.123752495 139% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.45718901454 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 1017.0 705.55239521 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 10.0 2.70958083832 369% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.4201144395 57.8364921388 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.071428571 119.503703932 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1071428571 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.46428571429 5.70786347227 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.292166142439 0.218282227539 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0930471867482 0.0743258471296 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0620092416242 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.182339911088 0.128457276422 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0470963146427 0.0628817314937 75% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 14.3799401198 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.17 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 145.0 98.500998004 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.