The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.
"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people ten to twenty-five years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
It follows from the argument that, Whirlwind is confident that the sales of videogames are going to boom, as they have recently launched many real-life graphics games based on the survey, they conducted recently with video game players. However, this argument will significantly strengthen or weaken, if more additional information regarding the survey, sales etc. is not provided. Hence, to completely evaluate this argument, some additional information needs to be collected, then thoroughly analyze what we learn.
The first piece of evidence is that, Whirlwind claims that their sales would significantly increase because of survey conducted which include many video game players. They also claim that the players are into the games that look like real-life. Apart from this, we would also need to know more about the survey. What genre of games players like? What kind (single player or multiplayer) of games they like? Games don’t run only run-on graphic; they also run-on story, physics etc. It is possible that, Whirlwind would develop a game in which graphics is extremely good, but lack in physics or story; as well as it is possible that they develop single player games, but, majority of the gamers need multiplayer game and vice-versa, which may lead to fewer sales on the games. Further, other game companies might also launch the games which are better than Whirlwind games, which may result in players prefer those rather than Whirlwind games. If any of the above scenarios hold water, then the argument is severely weakened.
Another piece of evidence is that, to run extremely good graphics games, players need latest up-to-date computers/laptops/consoles. These high-end computers are very much costly, and Whirlwind company has mentioned that their target audience is ten to twenty-five year old. One thing to mention is that, it also the age when people would like to start a career by focusing more on academics rather than playing games. It is possible that majority of ten to twenty-five age people focus on building their career, rather than playing games. It is also possible that, most of the ten- to fifteen-year-old don’t work and hence they rely on parents’ money. So for them, to buy games is majorly not possible. Therefore, if any of the above scenarios hold merit, then, the argument is significantly weakened.
In order to fully evaluated the argument, Whirlwind games prematurely assumes that, their sales may rise up in the coming few months. We live in an information age, in which everything is available on the Internet and everything is basically available for free. Hence, it is very much easy to develop duplicate (pirated) copies of anything developed by some hackers/developers. It is possible that, the games which are being developed by Whirlwind games may end in these hackers, which may lead to pirated copies of the Whirlwind games. These high-level graphics games are very huge in size, hence, it is possible that ten-to-twenty-year old people may copy the games from their friends and play. If these are the cases, then sales of these games might significantly decrease compared to last two years.
In conclusion, as it stands now, is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumptions. If the author is able to answer the above three questions and provide more evidence (perhaps in the form of systematic research study), then it will be possible to fully evaluate the viability of the proposed claim that sales of the Whirlwind games would increase.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 17 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 580 350
No. of Characters: 2866 1500
No. of Different Words: 248 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.907 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.941 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.57 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 184 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 148 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 113 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.308 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.815 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.731 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.485 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.129 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
It follows from the argument that, Whirl...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...en thoroughly analyze what we learn. The first piece of evidence is that, Whi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n the argument is severely weakened. Another piece of evidence is that, to ru...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 91, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[2]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'need the latest'.
Suggestion: need the latest
... extremely good graphics games, players need latest up-to-date computers/laptops/consoles. ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... argument is significantly weakened. In order to fully evaluated the argument...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 589, Rule ID: ADJECTIVE_IN_ATTRIBUTE[1]
Message: A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
Suggestion: huge
...hese high-level graphics games are very huge in size, hence, it is possible that ten-to-twen...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...decrease compared to last two years. In conclusion, as it stands now, is cons...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 389, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... of the Whirlwind games would increase.
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, look, may, regarding, so, then, therefore, well, apart from, in conclusion, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 31.0 19.6327345309 158% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 26.0 13.6137724551 191% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 28.8173652695 187% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 77.0 55.5748502994 139% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2970.0 2260.96107784 131% => OK
No of words: 574.0 441.139720559 130% => OK
Chars per words: 5.17421602787 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.89472135074 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85748914363 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 257.0 204.123752495 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.447735191638 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 918.9 705.55239521 130% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 4.96107784431 343% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 19.7664670659 142% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.0787025164 57.8364921388 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.071428571 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.42857142857 5.70786347227 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.255934729401 0.218282227539 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0718356046349 0.0743258471296 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0654363744669 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.151420834878 0.128457276422 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0790941164134 0.0628817314937 126% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 98.500998004 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.