The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Parkville Daily newspaper.
"Throughout the country last year, as more and more children below the age of nine participated in youth-league sports, over 40,000 of these young players suffered injuries. When interviewed for a recent study, youth-league soccer players in several major cities also reported psychological pressure exerted by coaches and parents to win games. Furthermore, education experts say that long practice sessions for these sports take away time that could be used for academic activities. Since the disadvantages outweigh any advantages, we in Parkville should discontinue organized athletic competition for children under nine."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the given editorial, the author concludes that Parkville should discontinue organized athletic competition for children under the age of nine. The author arrives at this constrictive conclusion based on the premise that most of these young players suffered injuries, reported psychological pressure and hinderance to their academic performances. The conclusion drawn by the author hold water, it rests on several unfounded assumptions that, if not substantiated, dramatically weakens the persuasiveness of the argument. Before we could accept or reject the claim, the folloeing assumptions must be addressed.
First, the author cites a 'recent study' regarding the youth players showing the exertion due to the psychological pressure. It is unclear, however, the scope and validity of the study. It is possible that the sample wouldnot have been the representitive of all the children below nine. The editorial states that the study was conducted accros several major cities, but fails to convey whether thecity of Pinkville is included or not. The wording of the study are vague and ambiguous. Moreover, the author fails to furnish statistical data and methodologies used to conduct this study. It is possible that the since pysochological pressure is intangible and cannot be quantified, this study would might lead to fallacious conclusion. Unless the author provides the details regarding the study, the validity and reliability cannot be verified. If either of the above is true, then the conclusion drawn in the original argument is significantly flawed.
Furthermore, the author assumes that long practice sessions is hindering their academic activities. However, this might not be the case. It is probable that only a few might face practice session as a potential deterrent to academics. Since the wordings 'long session' is subjective and ambiguous, it is higly likely that these session account for only small proptions of their time and most is devoted to academic activities. For instance, a kid attending 2 hour practice session alongside 6 hours of formal schooling would not enervate his academic performance. If the above is true, then the argument is weakened.
Finally, the author assumes that the recent study was conducted during last year, which suggests more than 40,000 young childrens suffered injuries. However, there is no evidence to bolster this claim. It is not unlikely that both the things are anchronistic. And the study cannot be attributed to the increasing injuries to young children. Foe instance, the study was conducted 10 years ago and only recently have the young children been suffering from these injuries. If the above assumption is unwarranted, then the argument does not hold water.
In conclusion, the argument as it stands now, is considerably flawed due to its reliance on several unwarranted assumtions. Moreover, the author fails to furnish peices of evidence to buttress his conclusion. Also, he/she fails to develop an efficient analogy between the increasing injuries, the psychological pressure and long practice sessions. If the author is able to address the above stated assumptions and perhaps, conduct a scientific study to evaluate the effects of athletics in younger children below nine, then we can fully evaluate the viability of the argument to discontinue organized athletic competition for children below the age of nine, in Parkville.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 29 15
No. of Words: 530 350
No. of Characters: 2806 1500
No. of Different Words: 243 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.798 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.294 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.878 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 214 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 178 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 140 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 77 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.276 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.638 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.621 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.272 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.452 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.078 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 165, Rule ID: MANY_NN_U[6]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun might seems to be uncountable; consider using: 'little might'.
Suggestion: little might
...be the case. It is probable that only a few might face practice session as a potential de...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 321, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this session' or 'these sessions'?
Suggestion: this session; these sessions
... and ambiguous, it is higly likely that these session account for only small proptions of the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 472, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'session' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'sessions'.
Suggestion: sessions
...stance, a kid attending 2 hour practice session alongside 6 hours of formal schooling w...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, moreover, regarding, so, then, for instance, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 31.0 19.6327345309 158% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 11.1786427146 134% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 28.8173652695 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2884.0 2260.96107784 128% => OK
No of words: 529.0 441.139720559 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.45179584121 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79583152331 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97214361578 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 254.0 204.123752495 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.480151228733 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 900.0 705.55239521 128% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 17.0 8.76447105788 194% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 19.7664670659 147% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 57.3180624705 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.4482758621 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2413793103 23.324526521 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.8275862069 5.70786347227 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 18.0 6.88822355289 261% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.135411802917 0.218282227539 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.031199418093 0.0743258471296 42% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0547073061944 0.0701772020484 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0810491790301 0.128457276422 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0625248283312 0.0628817314937 99% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 44.75 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.33 12.5979740519 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.8 8.32208582834 106% => OK
difficult_words: 143.0 98.500998004 145% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.