The following appeared in a memo from the marketing director of Top Dog Pet Stores.
"Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
five years ago ,fish emporium had advertised in exotic pets monthly magazine to increase their sale and even successful to increase their sale by 15 %. By taking into account the increased sales of fish emporium due to advertisement in exotic pets monthly, a recommendation of advertising about top dog pet in same magazine is brought into light, to reverse declining sales. Though evidences and facts of argument sounds valid , yet these are suffering from some weaknesses and causal assumption as well.
Firstly,in arguement success is ascribed to advertisement in a magazine. However it could be just a superfical factor,in reality some other factors might have played role in success. perhaps fish emporium beside advertisement had also started providing good customer service, different and good varieties of fishes had been added to collection, good looking aquariums had been brought,started charging reasonable rates. these factors are simply overlooked in given argument.
Secondly, advertisement had been given in magazine five years ago. 5 year is a long period of time .it is possible that at time exotic pets monthly was a very famous magazine but now no one reads this magazine, too many other good and famous magazines are in market,perhaps giving add in them may yield better results.Present status of magazine's popularity is not clear to use it as a support. On flip side it is also not clear that by how much sales in actual was increased by advertising in this magazine ,no base figure is provided.Over five years,15% increase is not a large number to consider.this 15% increase can be due to increase in population and raised demand of fish not due to advertisement.
Additionally, as sales of dogs is already declining for sure there must be some other reasons, like bad quality of dogs, less variety, lack of shops of special food and products of dogs, lack of good doctors for dog care. perhaps due to these reasons people are not preferring dogs. Moreover there might too many other pet shops in Gulf City who are providing very good services to people. Then just publishing advertisement in magazine without considering all these factors may not serve the purpose.
so overall there are many flaws in evidences and facts presented. too many pivotal factors are overlooked while drawing a conclusion of publishing advertisement in magazine. so to formulate a cogent policy to increase sales of top dog pet Stores there is need of properly evaluated figures and facts
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 415 350
No. of Characters: 2037 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.513 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.908 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.727 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 115 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 76 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 34.583 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.151 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.635 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Five
five years ago ,fish emporium had advertised...
^^^^
Line 1, column 15, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
five years ago ,fish emporium had advertised in exotic p...
^^
Line 1, column 427, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ences and facts of argument sounds valid , yet these are suffering from some weakn...
^^
Line 1, column 513, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , in
...s and causal assumption as well. Firstly,in arguement success is ascribed to advert...
^^^
Line 1, column 579, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...scribed to advertisement in a magazine. However it could be just a superfical factor,in...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 623, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , in
...ver it could be just a superfical factor,in reality some other factors might have p...
^^^
Line 1, column 689, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Perhaps
...tors might have played role in success. perhaps fish emporium beside advertisement had ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 890, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , started
... good looking aquariums had been brought,started charging reasonable rates. these factor...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 926, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: These
...ught,started charging reasonable rates. these factors are simply overlooked in given ...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 1065, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...gazine five years ago. 5 year is a long period of time .it is possible that at time exotic pet...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1079, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ars ago. 5 year is a long period of time .it is possible that at time exotic pets ...
^^
Line 1, column 1246, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , perhaps
... good and famous magazines are in market,perhaps giving add in them may yield better res...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1299, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Present
...ng add in them may yield better results.Present status of magazine’s popularity is no...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1424, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...p side it is also not clear that by how much sales in actual was increased by advert...
^^^^
Line 1, column 1490, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ncreased by advertising in this magazine ,no base figure is provided.Over five yea...
^^
Line 1, column 1519, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Over
...is magazine ,no base figure is provided.Over five years,15% increase is not a large ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 1911, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Perhaps
...ogs, lack of good doctors for dog care. perhaps due to these reasons people are not pre...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1947, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...re. perhaps due to these reasons people are not preferring dogs. Moreover there might too many oth...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 1972, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...reasons people are not preferring dogs. Moreover there might too many other pet shops in...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 2191, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...hese factors may not serve the purpose. so overall there are many flaws in evidenc...
^^
Line 1, column 2257, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Too
...flaws in evidences and facts presented. too many pivotal factors are overlooked whi...
^^^
Line 1, column 2365, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...f publishing advertisement in magazine. so to formulate a cogent policy to increas...
^^
Line 1, column 2490, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... of properly evaluated figures and facts
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, look, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, well, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.6327345309 127% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 28.8173652695 56% => OK
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2087.0 2260.96107784 92% => OK
No of words: 408.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.11519607843 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49433085973 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9934938373 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.544117647059 0.468620217663 116% => OK
syllable_count: 677.7 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 84.8899144649 57.8364921388 147% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.764705882 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.88235294118 5.70786347227 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 1.0 5.15768463074 19% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 23.0 5.25449101796 438% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.298050815395 0.218282227539 137% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0884687475088 0.0743258471296 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.107927491415 0.0701772020484 154% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.298050815395 0.128457276422 232% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0628817314937 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.66 48.3550499002 80% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.54 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 98.500998004 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Minimum four paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.