In this memo, the vice president of Health Naturally contends that they should open new chain store in Plainsville in that the company gained lots of profit from the place where people had high concerntration on advanced healthy lives. He assumes the Plainsville is the ideal place because the residents focused on healthy life style. The running shoes and exercise equipments were sold well, likewise, there were more and more gym members than five years ago in this place. Besides, the school children were required to join the exercise program called Fitness for life. While the author's conclusion was problematic and there are some loopholes in it. We need to evaluate them carefully.
To beign with, as a healthy food company, there was no relavance between the evidence and the conclsion. Because people's finess was not necessarily attributed with the health food or related products. On the other hand, the evidence proved that the people in this place may focus on doing gyms rather than taking health foods, thus the connection of the reason and assumption is not convincing.
In addtion, let's dig into these evidence. Firstly, the previous experince of the Health Naturally may not work at the Plainsville as there could be lots of diffrences between the regions. It is highly possible that the exprince is not feasilbe in Plainsviille. Secondly, the good sales of running shoes and execercise equipments could not prove the residents would like to take health food. Maybe this means that the residents likes running or merely buying shoes as a hobby for collection. Thirdly, the growing number of membership of the gym club was not neccesarily means they would buy more health food. Instead, it would be neccesary for the author to find out how many active members who do gyms frequently, in that some people merely bought the memership while they seldom went to do some sports at gym.
Moreover, the schoolchildren program which let them benefit from the regular execercise is not compelling. The children's participation in sports , however, also could not prove they would consume more health food. The nutrients in the health food could be absobed in the daily food they eat probably.
Conclusively, the atuhor's evidence is not convincing, in that there is no strong connnection between the reasons and argument. The author should do more survey if he would like to find out whether it is feasible to open a new store in Plainsville. HE should figure out the health food selling condition in this place to know whether the people like to eat these food or not. Also, the competitors' conditions in this place was equally important.
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 441 350
No. of Characters: 2161 1500
No. of Different Words: 219 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.583 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.9 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.545 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 150 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.174 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.396 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.522 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.281 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.479 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.101 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 583, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...gram called Fitness for life. While the authors conclusion was problematic and there ar...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 98, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...evious experince of the Health Naturally may not work at the Plainsville as there...
^^
Line 7, column 145, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...g. The childrens participation in sports , however, also could not prove they woul...
^^
Line 9, column 357, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this food' or 'these foods'?
Suggestion: this food; these foods
... to know whether the people like to eat these food or not. Also, the competitors condition...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, firstly, however, if, likewise, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, thus, well, while, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 55.5748502994 97% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2215.0 2260.96107784 98% => OK
No of words: 441.0 441.139720559 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02267573696 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.627183963 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 221.0 204.123752495 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.501133786848 0.468620217663 107% => OK
syllable_count: 667.8 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.4011847186 57.8364921388 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 96.3043478261 119.503703932 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1739130435 23.324526521 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.4347826087 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 8.20758483034 183% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.169753565621 0.218282227539 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0487013431714 0.0743258471296 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0587004698609 0.0701772020484 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103470596655 0.128457276422 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0251681187368 0.0628817314937 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 14.3799401198 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.3550499002 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 98.500998004 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.