The following appeared as part of a business plan developed by the manager of the Rialto Movie Theater.
"Despite its downtown location, the Rialto Movie Theater, a local institution for five decades, must make big changes or close its doors forever. It should follow the example of the new Apex Theater in the mall outside of town. When the Apex opened last year, it featured a video arcade, plush carpeting and seats, and a state-of-the-art sound system. Furthermore, in a recent survey, over 85 percent of respondents reported that the high price of newly released movies prevents them from going to the movies more than five times per year. Thus, if the Rialto intends to hold on to its share of a decreasing pool of moviegoers, it must offer the same features as Apex."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The manager recommends that Rialto Movie Theater should provide amenities similar to Apex Movie theater if they want to have a hold of the decreasing pool of moviegoers. The manager further cites, various advanced and attractive features present at Apex Theater to back up his claim. The manager also states the results of a survey to strengthen the claim that as the number of moviegoers are decreasing and an immediate action is the call of the situation. Though, the plan seems convincing at the first glance, on a closer scrutiny it is found to be filled with assumptions for which no substantial evidence has been provided.
To begin with, the argument asserts that the introduction of new characteristics like plush carpeting and seats will draw the attention of moviegoers and Rialto Movie Theater can continue to shine to its glory. The entire claim is based on the example of Apex theater, however, no significant relationship has been presented between the presence of amenities and an increase in the number of movie-goers at Apex theater. The author needs to provide the figures and the percentage increase in movie-goers at Apex because of the introduction of these features. It is not assured for certain that movie-goers prefer Apex for the mentioned features. Movie-goers may be un-effected by these fancy and extravagant features. The manager firstly needs to assure that these features affect the movie-goers through authenticated surveys and studies before proceeding with the plan.
Furthermore, the argument is based on the results of a recent survey in which 85 percent of respondents reported they go for movies only five times a year; however, no evidence has been presented which will help us in understanding the age-group or the characteristics of the respondents. The respondent might be people of the middle class who can not afford to visit movies regularly whereas the people who go to watch movies in Rialto Movie theater comprises of people from upper-middle class and upper class who are not affected by the high prices of movie tickets. In this case, the results of respondents can not be taken as an opinion of the entire population of movie-goers. In addition to this, we are also not informed whether the respondents go to Rialto Movie theater for watching movies. The respondents may be of a near-by theaters in which case, the results are not valid to Rialto Movie theater. Had, the author explicitly mentioned that the respondents visit Rialto Movie Theather and the survey covered a great range and number of people. The argument would have been stronger in its claim.
In addition to this, the location of Apex and Rialto theater vary a lot in their environments. Rialto theater is situated in a downtown area whereas Apex is situated outside the city premises. The manager needs to evaluate whether the changes that affected outside the city environment will yield the same result in the downtown area. Apex Theater has recently opened and these features might be a way to allure in more customers and been running for the last five decades. The situation of two theaters are pole apart. Therefore blinding copying the idea would not help Rialto. The manager needs to focus on real issues and make a proper analysis before going forward with the change.
Moreover, even if we are to consider the study to be authenticated and valid to Rialto Movie Theater, then also the main focus of Rialto management should be on reducing the price of the tickets. Reducing the price will help Rialto management in having a stronger hold on the movie-goers as their main reason for not watching movies is the high price. The management can focus on methods like the increasing number of viewers per show, this will help them to sell more tickets at a lower price and still not affect their profits. The manager needs to consider alternative solutions to the above problem.
To sum up, the manager claims to replicate the ideas of Apex Theater does not seem quite prudent. The manager needs to further, investigate, and perform proper analogy between Apex and Rialto Theater so that they can evaluate better by the process of parallelism. The manager also needs to verify the validity and scope of the study under consideration and it would be advisable for the manager to focus on the complaints of movie-goers rather than introducing new features. Without answers to these questions, the plan does not seem fit to be implemented at this stage.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 32 15
No. of Words: 749 350
No. of Characters: 3668 1500
No. of Different Words: 291 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.231 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.897 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.684 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 268 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 204 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 125 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 76 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.406 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.136 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.594 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.492 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.117 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 285, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...t at Apex Theater to back up his claim. The manager also states the results of a su...
^^^
Line 3, column 452, Rule ID: COMPRISES_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'comprises' or 'consists of'?
Suggestion: comprises; consists of
...to watch movies in Rialto Movie theater comprises of people from upper-middle class and uppe...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 520, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...tuation of two theaters are pole apart. Therefore blinding copying the idea would not hel...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 117, Rule ID: MAIN_FOCUS[1]
Message: Use simply 'focus'.
Suggestion: focus
... to Rialto Movie Theater, then also the main focus of Rialto management should be on reduc...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, still, then, therefore, whereas, in addition, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.6327345309 148% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 11.1786427146 197% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 28.8173652695 118% => OK
Preposition: 115.0 55.5748502994 207% => Less preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3731.0 2260.96107784 165% => OK
No of words: 749.0 441.139720559 170% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98130841121 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.23143043219 4.56307096286 115% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74293143613 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 302.0 204.123752495 148% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.403204272363 0.468620217663 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1166.4 705.55239521 165% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 25.0 8.76447105788 285% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 19.7664670659 162% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.101838751 57.8364921388 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.59375 119.503703932 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.40625 23.324526521 100% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.28125 5.70786347227 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.67664670659 235% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.318905677725 0.218282227539 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0947540024933 0.0743258471296 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0580358218997 0.0701772020484 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.186291208582 0.128457276422 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0249520678693 0.0628817314937 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 14.3799401198 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 158.0 98.500998004 160% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.