At first glance, the business plan of Rialto Movie Theatre to offer the same features as Apex Theatre seems viable, however there are gaps in the claims made in this memo. There are questions to the claims made by the author and they will be discussed in the following paragraphs.
Firstly, if Rialto were to offer the same features as Apex by adding in a video arcade, plush carpeting and seats, and state-of-the-art sound system, it would not automatically mean that moviegoers will choose Rialto over Apex. If both theatres offer the same features, what boils down would be the price of a movie ticket. For instance, if Rialto currently offers cheaper tickets but does not have the advanced features Apex does, it could be that moviegoers don’t mind paying a premium price for better comfort during a movie. As the author of this memo did not state pricing of tickets at either Rialto or Apex, it is premature to conclude that having same features as a competitor would result in more moviegoers going to Rialto than to Apex.
Another piece of evidence the author failed to state is what is the current data of moviegoers that patronise either Rialto or Apex. Does Apex have more moviegoers than Rialto? Additionally, what kind of movies do both theatres screen? Does Apex screen more recent movies than Rialto does? As the author of the memo had given data that 85% of respondents don’t see newly release movies more than five times a year because of pricey tickets. Such crucial data could help contribute to the author’s reasoning as to why Rialto should follow Apex and have the same features.
Lastly, the 85% of respondents that reported not wanting to pay high prices for newly released films does not explain how Rialto will gain more moviegoers if they offer the same features as Apex. In this day and age where technology is so advanced, one can watch a movie online at the comfort of their own home. Moreover, when purchasing a movie online, they will be able to stream movies as many times as they like. Whereas at a movie theatre, moviegoers will only be able to watch the movie once, and if they would like to do so again they would need to purchase another ticket. One avenue Rialto can look at is to offer movie deals online. This way, they will have both on location, and online customers.
To sum, the business development plan issued by the manager of Rialto will not be able to have its predicted results. This is because of the claims made that are not supported with evidence, and Rialto might end up spending even more money and not being able to earn a profit or breakeven.
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 463 350
No. of Characters: 2091 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.639 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.516 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.265 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 137 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 79 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.15 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.996 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.55 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.355 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.567 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.121 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, however, if, lastly, look, moreover, so, whereas, as to, for instance, kind of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 28.8173652695 83% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 16.3942115768 30% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2161.0 2260.96107784 96% => OK
No of words: 460.0 441.139720559 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.69782608696 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6311565067 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.37899102535 2.78398813304 85% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 204.123752495 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.458695652174 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 673.2 705.55239521 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.8938950155 57.8364921388 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.05 119.503703932 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.95 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.88822355289 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.67664670659 257% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.156087127957 0.218282227539 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0610020481651 0.0743258471296 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0461394839499 0.0701772020484 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.104872623397 0.128457276422 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0295414777933 0.0628817314937 47% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.28 12.5979740519 82% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.52 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.