The following appeared as part of a letter to the editor of a scientific journal.
"A recent study of eighteen rhesus monkeys provides clues as to the effects of birth order on an individual's levels of stimulation. The study showed that in stimulating situations (such as an encounter with an unfamiliar monkey), firstborn infant monkeys produce up to twice as much of the hormone cortisol, which primes the body for increased activity levels, as do their younger siblings. Firstborn humans also produce relatively high levels of cortisol in stimulating situations (such as the return of a parent after an absence). The study also found that during pregnancy, first-time mother monkeys had higher levels of cortisol than did those who had had several offspring."
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
As the study shows that rhesus monkeys produce higher levels of cortisol when they have an encounter with unfamiliar things. This could also mean that the body of rhesus monkeys or mammals in general produce higher level of cortisol when they are in dangerous situations. An encounter with an unfamiliar monkey or situation could be the body’s way of preparing itself for an unforeseen dangerous scenario.
Rise in levels of cortisol could also suggest curiosity about an unfamiliar encounter for the body. Meeting a new member from the group or getting pregnant for the first time are all new situations for the body, hence to counter the new environment the body increases its activity level by secreting cortisol along with other compounds.
Change in emotions for a mammal or an emotional outburst could also lead to the release of cortisol. The feeling of joy, pain or fear could justify the body needs to increases its activity level. Arrival of parents after a prolonged period of absence or sight some unfamiliar member, these all could lead to emotional outbursts. To tackle these emotional outbursts, the body releases cortisol. This might also be consistent with the fact that higher level of cortisol is not observed when the monkeys meet someone familiar or they get pregnant multiple times. Also as cortisol is not released for other stimulus such as sound or touch. This suggests that stimulus alone cannot be responsible for the release of cortisol.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As the study shows that rhesus monkeys pro...
^^
Line 3, column 376, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'releases'' or 'release's'?
Suggestion: releases'; release's
...kle these emotional outbursts, the body releases cortisol. This might also be consistent...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 561, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...ar or they get pregnant multiple times. Also as cortisol is not released for other s...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, hence, if, so, in general, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 19.6327345309 36% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 55.5748502994 50% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 3.0 16.3942115768 18% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1231.0 2260.96107784 54% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 242.0 441.139720559 55% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.0867768595 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.94415379849 4.56307096286 86% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56953366281 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 123.0 204.123752495 60% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.50826446281 0.468620217663 108% => OK
syllable_count: 387.9 705.55239521 55% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 19.7664670659 61% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.2685658659 57.8364921388 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.583333333 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.1666666667 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.91666666667 5.70786347227 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 5.15768463074 58% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0959098539106 0.218282227539 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0445249357141 0.0743258471296 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0555841263358 0.0701772020484 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0778912083397 0.128457276422 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.061375993992 0.0628817314937 98% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 12.5979740519 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 98.500998004 57% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted.
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Rates: 33.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 2.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.