The following appeared as a recommendation by a committee planning a ten-year budget for the city of Calatrava.
"The birthrate in our city is declining: in fact, last year's birthrate was only one-half that of five years ago. Thus the number of students enrolled in our public schools will soon decrease dramatically, and we can safely reduce the funds budgeted for education during the next decade. At the same time, we can reduce funding for athletic playing fields and other recreational facilities. As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In order to increase adult population the author of the recommendation suggests reducing funding for public schools and recreational facilities. This statement is buttressed by several evidences which should be carefully scrutinized in order to gauge the soundness of the recommendation.
First of all, we were told that the birthrate is declining and today it is only fifty per cent that of five years ago. The author tends to claim that because of the decline the number of children who enroll at schools will fall as well. At the same time, the number of students who enroll at local school may remain or even increase because some families with children may move to Calatrava. The town may be attractive for citizens of the coutnry in case Calatrava has a strong inductrial sector or new business set up in it. Moreover, today we see a significant migration from war-zones, perhaps some alylem seekers may move to Calatrava. Consequently, the decline in the birthrate does not inevitably mean that number of children will decline.
The author of the recommendation claims that city may safely reduce funding for sprot and recreational facilities. The author's claim is based on unstated assumption that only children use these facilities. However, in reality recreational and sport facilities are used by elderly and adults. Moreover, the children of the city should have a possibility to use these facilities as well. Because parents of young dwellers may decide to change their place for living in order to assure their progeny have access to all facilities which are needed for them. Thus, if the town wants to attract new residents, the stopping funding for athletic and leisure facilities is not a decent idea. Besides, the argument avers that implementation of the policy and redistribution of money on city facilities and programs which are used by adults will lead to increase of adult population. Although these factors may play a role for some adults, the major factor for many adults, who are often parents, is a possibility to give their children a decent education. In fact, the majority of adults are parents who profoundly care about the future of their progeny, consequently, schools, sport facilities for children are important factors which are taken into account when people make a decision about chaning place for living.
In conclusion, the author of the recommendation believes that reduction of birthrate will unescapably cause the decline in number of school students, however, we have demonstrated that this assumption is unwarranted. Moreover, the writer's proposal to cut funding of public education and facilities which are used by youngsters may hurt interests of the city dut to the fact that many adults are parents who desire for their offspring to give a better education and life. Thus, the recommendation may not bring expected results - increase in adult population.
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Sentence: The author of the recommendation claims that city may safely reduce funding for sprot and recreational facilities.
Error: sprot Suggestion: sport
Sentence: In fact, the majority of adults are parents who profoundly care about the future of their progeny, consequently, schools, sport facilities for children are important factors which are taken into account when people make a decision about chaning place for living.
Error: chaning Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In conclusion, the author of the recommendation believes that reduction of birthrate will unescapably cause the decline in number of school students, however, we have demonstrated that this assumption is unwarranted.
Error: unescapably Suggestion: inescapably
Sentence: Moreover, the writer's proposal to cut funding of public education and facilities which are used by youngsters may hurt interests of the city dut to the fact that many adults are parents who desire for their offspring to give a better education and life.
Error: dut Suggestion: No alternate word
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not OK. read it here:
As a result, we will have sufficient money to fund city facilities and programs used primarily by adults, since we can expect the adult population of the city to increase.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 471 350
No. of Characters: 2389 1500
No. of Different Words: 211 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.659 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.072 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.818 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 177 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 133 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 97 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.55 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.558 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.85 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.33 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.499 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.108 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Hello, my reader.
This question is about this argument:
The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company.
"According to a recent report from our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies actually increased during the past year. Clearly, the contents of these reviews are not reaching enough of our prospective viewers. Thus, the problem lies not with the quality of our movies but with the public's lack of awareness that movies of good quality are available. Super Screen should therefore allocate a greater share of its budget next year to reaching the public through advertising."
The question is:
1) this author's analysis got scored at 5. Is this evaluation correct?
1.1) In particular I am interested in usage of statistical terminology for the first argument"". Is it a decent way to criticize? I as you because this seems to be the more simple way to critique any argument. (I clearly understand that the author has superior language skills but I am concerned with the content of the argument.)
2) the author answer differs from the paragon which is given by readers: http://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/following-taken-mem…
The second question is what way is better?
Thank you for your help. I have not manage to understand the proper way to analyze arguments. I hope with your help to figure it out.
1)Yes, you can cast doubt for sure, but be sensitive, in this essay, there is an absolute number to compare with:
absolute number: fewer people attended Super Screen-produced movies than in any other year.
relative percentage : And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers
2) this is easier to understand and better:
Perhaps viewers have discovered a cheaper or more convenient means of watching these movies without attending the theatre. If that is the case, then the publicity of Super Screen movies is not the issue and advertising would make no impact to the situation. Advances in technology such as the internet, and DVDs are now being used by the general public to see movies at cheaper costs.