The following is a letter from the parent of a private school student to the principal of that school:
Last year, Kensington Academy turned over management of its cafeteria to a private vendor, Swift Nutrition. This company serves low-fat, low-calorie meals that students do not find enjoyable – my son and several of his friends came home yesterday complaining about the lunch options. While the intent of hiring Swift may have been to cause students to eat healthier foods, the plan is just going to cause students to bring their own, less healthy lunches instead of eating cafeteria food. If Swift is not replaced with another vendor, there will be serious health consequences for Kensington students.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction
The argument claims that if swift is not replaced with another vendor, there will be serious health consequences for the students in the Kensington Academy.The argument is based on many false assumptions on the basis of which it could not be evaluated.Had the argument provided more substantial evidence strengthening the underlying assumptions,the conclusion would be more valid.
First of all,the author readily assumes that if his son and several of his friends do not find the lunch enjoyable, the swift nutrition should be replaced.This is a mere assumption made without solid ground.To illustrate this there could be 2000 students in the kensington academy who would be enjoying the low-fat and low-calorie food and his son and several friends could accomodate only for a mere 20 students.Therefore the argument is based on faulty reasoning that the author's son and his friends represent the entire academy and as they do not find the low-calorie low-fat food enjoyable,then the vendor should be replaced.
Furthermore the argument cites that the Kensington Academy turned over management of its cafeteria last year to the Swift Nutrition and the author's son and his friends complained about the lunch options yesterday.The argument fails to provide justification to this assumption,if the food is not enjoyable then why didn't the students complain to their parents when Kensington academy first turned its management over to the Swift Nutrition.If the argument had provided information to justify this assumption then it could be considerably strengthened.
Additionally,the argument assumes that other vendor's cafeteria food is healthier than the food that would be brought by the students.This is just an assumption and the author fails to provide evidence to strengthen this assumption.For instance the new vendor couls start giving foods with high calories and fats that are unhealthy and the students could possibly be restricted by their parents in consuming such food.Hence this is just an assumption without proper justification.
On the whole if the argument had provided substantial evidence to counter the flaws,the argument would be much more valid.We need knowledge of all contributing factors of the argument beofre coming to a conclusion.Hence with the flaws in the argument and its improper justification the argument's conclusion has no legas to stand on.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 7 15
No. of Words: 387 350
No. of Characters: 1986 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.435 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.132 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.822 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 121 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 92 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 55.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 27.876 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 1 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.495 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.827 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.134 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 157, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
... the students in the Kensington Academy.The argument is based on many false assumpt...
^^^
Line 1, column 253, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Had
...asis of which it could not be evaluated.Had the argument provided more substantial ...
^^^
Line 1, column 345, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...strengthening the underlying assumptions,the conclusion would be more valid. Firs...
^^^^
Line 3, column 13, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...ion would be more valid. First of all,the author readily assumes that if his son ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 156, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
... the swift nutrition should be replaced.This is a mere assumption made without solid...
^^^^
Line 3, column 208, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: To
...re assumption made without solid ground.To illustrate this there could be 2000 stu...
^^
Line 3, column 414, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Therefore
... accomodate only for a mere 20 students.Therefore the argument is based on faulty reasoni...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 414, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
... accomodate only for a mere 20 students.Therefore the argument is based on faulty reasoni...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 475, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...t is based on faulty reasoning that the authors son and his friends represent the entir...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 594, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , then
...d the low-calorie low-fat food enjoyable,then the vendor should be replaced. Furth...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Furthermore,
...,then the vendor should be replaced. Furthermore the argument cites that the Kensington ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 141, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ast year to the Swift Nutrition and the authors son and his friends complained about th...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 214, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...ained about the lunch options yesterday.The argument fails to provide justification...
^^^
Line 5, column 276, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , if
...provide justification to this assumption,if the food is not enjoyable then why didn...
^^^
Line 5, column 315, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...n,if the food is not enjoyable then why didnt the students complain to their parents ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 440, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
... management over to the Swift Nutrition.If the argument had provided information t...
^^
Line 5, column 440, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... management over to the Swift Nutrition.If the argument had provided information t...
^^
Line 7, column 13, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...nsiderably strengthened. Additionally,the argument assumes that other vendors caf...
^^^^
Line 7, column 46, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'vendors'' or 'vendor's'?
Suggestion: vendors'; vendor's
...ionally,the argument assumes that other vendors cafeteria food is healthier than the fo...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 134, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
...d that would be brought by the students.This is just an assumption and the author fa...
^^^^
Line 7, column 232, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: For
... evidence to strengthen this assumption.For instance the new vendor couls start giv...
^^^
Line 7, column 349, Rule ID: MAY_COULD_POSSIBLY[1]
Message: Use simply 'could'.
Suggestion: could
...ats that are unhealthy and the students could possibly be restricted by their parents in consu...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 418, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Hence
...by their parents in consuming such food.Hence this is just an assumption without prop...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 418, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...by their parents in consuming such food.Hence this is just an assumption without prop...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 84, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , the
...ubstantial evidence to counter the flaws,the argument would be much more valid.We ne...
^^^^
Line 9, column 123, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: We
...s,the argument would be much more valid.We need knowledge of all contributing fact...
^^
Line 9, column 215, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Hence
... argument beofre coming to a conclusion.Hence with the flaws in the argument and its ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 215, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... argument beofre coming to a conclusion.Hence with the flaws in the argument and its ...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 287, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'arguments'' or 'argument's'?
Suggestion: arguments'; argument's
...ment and its improper justification the arguments conclusion has no legas to stand on. ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 296, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...its improper justification the arguments conclusion has no legas to stand on.
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, hence, if, so, then, therefore, as to, for instance, first of all, on the whole
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 55.5748502994 65% => OK
Nominalization: 31.0 16.3942115768 189% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2025.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 368.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.5027173913 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37987740619 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.22153701582 2.78398813304 116% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.472826086957 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 600.3 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 5.0 19.7664670659 25% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 73.0 22.8473053892 320% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 108.206099643 57.8364921388 187% => OK
Chars per sentence: 405.0 119.503703932 339% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 73.6 23.324526521 316% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 20.8 5.70786347227 364% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 30.0 5.25449101796 571% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 8.20758483034 12% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.185863393246 0.218282227539 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.107665463707 0.0743258471296 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0804204884525 0.0701772020484 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107665463707 0.128457276422 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0804204884525 0.0628817314937 128% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 41.3 14.3799401198 287% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -2.62 48.3550499002 -5% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 15.9 7.1628742515 222% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 31.8 12.197005988 261% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 15.8 12.5979740519 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 10.99 8.32208582834 132% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 98.500998004 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 27.5 12.3882235529 222% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 31.2 11.1389221557 280% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 16.0 11.9071856287 134% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.