The following is a recommendation from the business manager of Monarch Books.
"Monarch Books should open a cafe in its store to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened a cafe. Monarch, which has been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer following because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Opening the cafe would clearly attract more customers. The cafe would require relatively little space. Space could be made for the cafe by discontinuing the children's book section, which will likely become less popular given that the last national census indicated a significant decline in the percent of the population who are under age ten."
The author recommend that, by opening café Monarch books will be able to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books. Stated in this way, the argument reveals several instances of poor reasoning and fails to measure some of the key factors, on the basis of which it could be evaluated. To support this argument author reasons that Monarch is well established on same place for more than twenty years and it has large customer base. However careful scrutiny of the evidence reveals that it offer little credible support to the author's recommendation. Hence the argument can be considered incomplete.
First of all, the argument readily assumes that by opening a café by Monarch Books in its store it will be able to attract more customers. This is merely an assumption made without much solid ground. As cafes are generally made for hangout and to have snacks, so how would it attract customer for Monarch Books? And if we consider that all people visit the café would be having reading a book as a primary purpose then also there would be much disturbance café premises. So eventually reader will be unable to concentrate on reading and they will obviously not prefer café for reading purpose. Hence the argument would have been much more convincing if it explicitly stated that reader likes to read Monarch Books in a Cafe.
The author also point out that Monarch has a large customer base and it is at same place for more than twenty years. This is again a weak claim as it contradicts with author argument to open a café to compete with Regal Books, but this statement indicates that Monarch has already strong customer base to complete with Regal Books. It is not necessary to copy our opponent to defeat him. If this argument has provided evidence that Regal has even more strong base than Monarch and by opening café customer could be gained then it would have been a lot more convincing to reader.
Finally, the author tells that the space for café should be made by discontinuing the children's book section. Which is based on vague premise that the children books will become less popular as recent national census indicated a significant decline in population under age ten. First of all this premise is making assumption that "will probably become less popular", this itself is dubious; and the second point is that in whole argument it is not at all indicated that the reader for children books are under age ten only. Adult can't read children books? Without convincing answer to this question, the reader can't be convinced to discontinuing children's book section.
In conclusion, the author’s argument is unpersuasive as it stands. Finally, to better check the argument, it would be necessary to know more information about, who are the readers of children books? ; Which environment is most liked by reader of Monarch Books? To bolster it further, the author must give better evidence.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 496 350
No. of Characters: 2378 1500
No. of Different Words: 214 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.719 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.794 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.447 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 168 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.565 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.925 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.652 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.517 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.088 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 12, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'recommends'.
Suggestion: recommends
The author recommend that, by opening café Monarch books wil...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 232, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
... of poor reasoning and fails to measure some of the key factors, on the basis of which it c...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 542, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...it offer little credible support to the authors recommendation. Hence the argument can ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 566, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... support to the authors recommendation. Hence the argument can be considered incomple...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 595, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ly not prefer café for reading purpose. Hence the argument would have been much more ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 541, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ren books are under age ten only. Adult cant read children books? Without convincing...
^^^^
Line 7, column 622, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...ing answer to this question, the reader cant be convinced to discontinuing childrens...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, hence, however, if, second, so, then, well, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 28.8173652695 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 55.5748502994 99% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 16.3942115768 146% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2454.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 496.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94758064516 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71922212354 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56040466734 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 204.123752495 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.439516129032 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 758.7 705.55239521 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 19.7664670659 121% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.1317676036 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.25 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.6666666667 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.08333333333 5.70786347227 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.284997432824 0.218282227539 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0906285067403 0.0743258471296 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.105496947079 0.0701772020484 150% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.171041427294 0.128457276422 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0722411759494 0.0628817314937 115% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.3799401198 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 12.5979740519 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.62 8.32208582834 92% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.