In this recommendation, the business manager of Monarch Books argues that the Moarch Books should change the place for children's readings with the café like its competitor Book and Bean did due to the national decline in the percentage of children. While the suggestion is problematic in that there are some loopholes in it, let's evaluate them carefully.
To begin with, whehter there is the necessity that the Monarch Books should follow the competitor's style or not is still in question. In that Having been opening for twenty years, the Monarch Book store has already be accepted by its own style which is friendly to readers and has a comprehensive seletion of books. Probably, this is why readers are in favor of the store. While even if there is a minor alternation like replacing the childrens' books into café, the consequence may be unpredictable. Thus more survey are required to find out whether the readers would like to accept this changing.
In addtion, whether the competitor Book and bean would come to open a new bookstore is unclear. Given that there is merely an intention of the plan, It may be premature to take actions ahead of the competitor does, let alone the consequence of the change is still not clear which I discussed above. On the other hand, whether the readers would welcome this exotic bookstore or not is still unclear. Thus the author should take a local bookstores survey to find out more evidence to prove the preference of readers on the bookstores.
What's more, I contend that the national data of the children's populaiton can not be applied to the regional place like Collegeville.In that even if the national data shows that the population percentage of people under the age of ten is declining. This can not represent the Collegeville's condtion due to the regional difference. Maybe the children's population in this place is becoming more and more rencently thus the demands for children's book would increase. Moreover, even if the chilren's population is decreasing, there would be no obvious connnetion with the preference of the children's book in that most of the children in this place may be infavor of reading many books thus the desire for books is still very high. So it would be arbitrary to replace the children's books section before more suvrey having been made.
In all, I totally conprehend this manager and it is wise to make move before the competitors next step. While before comprehensive suvery and research made, the suggstion is not compelling.If the manager wants to take cations, he should collect and analyze more informations surveyed in Collegeville. Firstly, the local readers' acceptence of café in a bookstore. Secondly, the local competiors' plan or establishiments of the bookstore. Thirdly, the local preference of children's books.
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 469 350
No. of Characters: 2301 1500
No. of Different Words: 211 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.654 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.906 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.765 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.18 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.528 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.11 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 216, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'been'.
Suggestion: been
...ars, the Monarch Book store has already be accepted by its own style which is frie...
^^
Line 3, column 501, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
..., the consequence may be unpredictable. Thus more survey are required to find out wh...
^^^^
Line 5, column 400, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...otic bookstore or not is still unclear. Thus the author should take a local bookstor...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
...erence of readers on the bookstores. Whats more, I contend that the national data ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 133, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: In
...to the regional place like Collegeville.In that even if the national data shows th...
^^
Line 9, column 190, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...h made, the suggstion is not compelling.If the manager wants to take cations, he s...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, still, third, thirdly, thus, while, to begin with, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 55.5748502994 115% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 16.3942115768 134% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2350.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 467.0 441.139720559 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.03211991435 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64867537961 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83258715992 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 204.123752495 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.449678800857 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 729.0 705.55239521 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.627993383 57.8364921388 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.904761905 119.503703932 94% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2380952381 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.95238095238 5.70786347227 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.192428271801 0.218282227539 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0610770740935 0.0743258471296 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0654163287203 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.123651570342 0.128457276422 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0782220147614 0.0628817314937 124% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 12.5979740519 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 98.500998004 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.