GRE Argument: An international development organization, in response to a vitamin A deficiency among people in the impoverished nation of Tagus, has engineered a new breed of millet high in vitamin A. While seeds for this new type of millet cost more, far

The argument claims that the government must promote some engineered breed of millet to combat the deficiency of Vitamin A in the people of Tagus. Stated in this way the argument fails to answer a few questions which need to be answered for a better evaluation of the conclusion made. The conclusion of the argument relies on assumptions for which there is no clear evidence. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.

First, the argument readily assumes that the people of Tagus have only one staple food and that is millet. What if they have more than one staple foods. And when the price of millet goes high after cultivating this new breed then people would choose other staple food over millet and this will make the whole scheme fail. The argument must have been much clearer if it explicitly stated that the only staple food in Tagus is millet.

Second, the question which needs to answered is the price of this millet after cultivation. There might be a case where the price must be way higher than that of the traditional millet owing to which people might not choose to buy the new millet. Even if subsidies are given to the farmers this does not mean that the price of the new millet will be cheap. If the price turns out to be high then people would not bother to purchase this new millet which in turn will fail the new scheme. If the argument had provided some information on the price then the argument would have been more convincing.

Finally, one more question which needs to be elaborated is, is this the only way to curb the deficiency of vitamin A. There might be some other cheaper ways to tackle this situation. There needs to a proper study done and then only we can say that this is the only way of solving this problem. By only promoting this product the deficiency will reduce is questionable. Another question is the taste of the millet; has it change of is it the same. If the taste is changed then people won't eat this new hybrid millet which in turn will weaken the conclusion.

Hence, as is evident from the aforementioned analysis, the claims put forward by the author have not been fortified with relevant feedbacks, statistics, and comparative data. Thus, they fail to convince the reader.

Votes
Average: 5 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 248, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even if” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...might not choose to buy the new millet. Even if subsidies are given to the farmers this...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 358, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... price of the new millet will be cheap. If the price turns out to be high then peo...
^^
Line 5, column 489, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...which in turn will fail the new scheme. If the argument had provided some informat...
^^
Line 7, column 422, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'changes'?
Suggestion: changes
...tion is the taste of the millet; has it change of is it the same. If the taste is chan...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 448, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...illet; has it change of is it the same. If the taste is changed then people wont e...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, hence, if, second, so, then, thus

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1855.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 399.0 441.139720559 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.64912280702 5.12650576532 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46933824581 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38258485125 2.78398813304 86% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 204.123752495 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.426065162907 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 570.6 705.55239521 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.9743430072 57.8364921388 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.3333333333 119.503703932 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.33333333333 5.70786347227 41% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.293480004269 0.218282227539 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0971612767154 0.0743258471296 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0717478121082 0.0701772020484 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.16069512358 0.128457276422 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.082801270294 0.0628817314937 132% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 14.3799401198 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 48.3550499002 143% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 12.197005988 68% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.69 12.5979740519 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.15 8.32208582834 86% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 400 350
No. of Characters: 1811 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.472 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.528 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.302 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 109 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 64 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 47 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.308 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.335 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.567 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.123 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5