Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent During the same year Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space mo

Essay topics:

"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space, most likely because instruction in the online programs takes place via the Internet. In contrast, over the past three years, enrollment at Humana University has failed to grow, and the cost of maintaining buildings has increased along with our budget deficit. To address these problems, Humana University will begin immediately to create and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni. We predict that instituting these online degree programs will help Humana both increase its total enrollment and solve its budget problems."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.

The president of humana university predicts that instituting online programs will help the school both increase its enrollment and relief the budget burden, due to the fact that the increased number of students in the online programs and the decreased expenditures in omni university. however, some questions should be answered in order to evalute the prediction.

The first question we need to ask is that whether the online degree program would stimulate more students to enroll in the university. Perhaps, in omni university, it is inconvenient for students to take part in classes. As a result, after getting such information from their seniors, many students choose to take online courses, but the total number of students who enter omni university remains the same or even decrease. if that is true, the online program will not be able to attract more students to choose humana.

Asides of the question about the relation between online projects and enrollment, we should also examine the question about the cause of declined expenditures in omni. is the online degree projects that help saved the cost of maintaining the buildings? it is possible that after omni has accomplished its construction or modification of many new buildings, they have already cut the budget of such projects, decreasing the expenditures for these activities. this means, even without a online degree program, the cost on such issue will also decrease. Besides, maybe with the online degree available, there are still many students choose to study in the campus, leading to relatively smaller decrease cost in maintaining the infrastructure. Therefore, the proposal in humana university will not realize its goal on saving their budget.

even if such online degree program can actually save the budget on maintaining the facilities, we still need to ask the question about whether the cost of online program will eventually help reduce the total cost. What is overlooked is the cost of building the online learning system which is competent enough to provide students with the courses they need. To achieve such goal, humana university would have to purchase many servers to build a online learning system, hire more engineers to maintain such system and ask teachers to prepare online cources, which is quite different with traditional classes. Admittedly, such project would help save the money consumed on maintaining facilities, the total cost to maintain the online learning system as a whole, however, will outweigh the that on the money saved. In this circumstance, the budget problems will not be saved.

it is understandable that the president of humana university is eager to solve the problems about the enrollment and budget. but it is sensible to examine the questions mentioned above in order to evaluate whether the online projects will actually solve these problems.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (6 votes)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 286, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: However
...reased expenditures in omni university. however, some questions should be answered in o...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in order to evalute the prediction. The first question we need to ask is tha...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...university. Perhaps, in omni university, it is inconvenient for students to take ...
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Suggestion: If
...sity remains the same or even decrease. if that is true, the online program will n...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...ract more students to choose humana. Asides of the question about the relatio...
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Suggestion: Is
...cause of declined expenditures in omni. is the online degree projects that help sa...
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Suggestion: It
... the cost of maintaining the buildings? it is possible that after omni has accompl...
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Suggestion: This
... the expenditures for these activities. this means, even without a online degree pro...
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Line 9, column 484, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
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...se activities. this means, even without a online degree program, the cost on such...
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Line 9, column 691, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...he campus, leading to relatively smaller decrease cost in maintaining the infrast...
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Line 11, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ize its goal on saving their budget. even if such online degree program can a...
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...ts goal on saving their budget. even if such online degree program can actua...
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Line 13, column 113, Rule ID: ASK_THE_QUESTION[1]
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Suggestion: ask
...aining the facilities, we still need to ask the question about whether the cost of online progra...
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Line 13, column 444, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... have to purchase many servers to build a online learning system, hire more engin...
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Line 15, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...e budget problems will not be saved. it is understandable that the president ...
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...get problems will not be saved. it is understandable that the president of...
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Suggestion: But
...oblems about the enrollment and budget. but it is sensible to examine the questions...
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... will actually solve these problems.
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, besides, but, first, however, if, look, may, so, still, therefore, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.6327345309 81% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 55.5748502994 112% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2448.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 459.0 441.139720559 104% => OK
Chars per words: 5.33333333333 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62863751936 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76498313547 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.427015250545 0.468620217663 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 761.4 705.55239521 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.5548844888 57.8364921388 108% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.842105263 119.503703932 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1578947368 23.324526521 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.94736842105 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 18.0 5.25449101796 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.20211512799 0.218282227539 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0739303895981 0.0743258471296 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0602083570836 0.0701772020484 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.139810555497 0.128457276422 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0733697973285 0.0628817314937 117% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.3799401198 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.66 48.3550499002 80% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.93 12.5979740519 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 98.500998004 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 459 350
No. of Characters: 2359 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.629 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.139 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.665 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 185 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 132 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 97 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 32.786 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 18.933 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.394 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.615 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5