While the recommendation to admit students in Pirouettes Ballet school - considered as one of the best Ballet school of Elmtown seems like a good choice, the author's claim on the supporting statements is not substantial enough to prove that the institution as a clear choice. Though its is appreciable to get information about the teachers of the institution and their intensive programs, there are few other exact details required to make the recommendation plausible. Despite the fact that placement of students in the top dance companies as professional dancers strengthens the author's suggestion, there are other hidden facts that needs to be addressed for advocating Pirouettes Ballet school as the valid option.
Firstly, the author mentions about the intensive program for students as the main idea behind the program. It may be a good intention to impose rigorous methods on students, but sometimes it is likely to attenuate the student's interests in dancing. If for some reasons an intense dance program may not be suitable for all the age groups, the author failed to present the details about the programs distinctive for certain age groups. Is there any viable option for amateur dancers? Does the intensive dancing deteriorate the health of young students? Is there any repercussions that must be dealt with after attending the intensive classes? In fact, these details are may be required by the parents before enrolling their wards in to such vigorous training venture. If the author had provided some meaningful insights about the level of intensity designed for the age groups, then his advice for admitting the students in to the reputed Ballet school is substantiated enough.
Furthermore, there is this ambiguous statement about the teachers of the Ballet School. It is assumed that when a teacher is able to participate in dance performances of famous companies, he/she is versatile only because he/she is a teacher of this institution. Does that mean the teachers were trained in the mentioned ballet school? Perhaps, the teachers may be recruited from abroad to incorporate high level precisions in dancing. To exemplify, a teacher might have graduated from a dance school in the France, but could have found opportunity only in Elmtown that is situated in some other nation. It is clearly evident that a teacher need not be trained in to the same school for dance. Even if the teacher is said to have been trained in the same Ballet school, there is no clear assurance about the teaching services provided by the teacher. The author compares the teacher's dancing to the ability to educate the students. Hence, the author's claim on the teachers having performed at most reputed ballet companies falls apart.
Finally, there is an unclear statistic provided about most of the students placed in top dance companies as professional dancers. Had the author mentioned about the number of batches handled and appropriated it with the year of establishment of the institution, then there is a possibility to compare the totally placed professional dancers. While the author assumes that most of the students are transformed to professional dancers, he did not mention about the companies that recruited the students. Indeed there may be a dance company associated or affiliated to the Ballet school that probably uses this as an advertising criteria for the school to flourish.
To conclude, without expounding the details about the mentioned statements, the author's advice for opting to enroll the students in Pirouettes Ballet school proves to be implausible.
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 579 350
No. of Characters: 2955 1500
No. of Different Words: 245 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.905 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.104 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.788 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 237 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 177 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 120 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 78 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.16 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.362 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.319 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.319 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 582, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...as professional dancers strengthens the authors suggestion, there are other hidden fact...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 502, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Indeed,
... companies that recruited the students. Indeed there may be a dance company associated...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 81, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ils about the mentioned statements, the authors advice for opting to enroll the student...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, hence, if, may, so, then, while, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 29.0 28.8173652695 101% => OK
Preposition: 80.0 55.5748502994 144% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3007.0 2260.96107784 133% => OK
No of words: 577.0 441.139720559 131% => OK
Chars per words: 5.21143847487 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.90110439584 4.56307096286 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85072443944 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 204.123752495 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.447140381282 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 924.3 705.55239521 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.7484198918 57.8364921388 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.28 119.503703932 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.08 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.32 5.70786347227 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 14.0 4.67664670659 299% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.378540327884 0.218282227539 173% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114178279008 0.0743258471296 154% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0650189354867 0.0701772020484 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.213059591387 0.128457276422 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0523941014674 0.0628817314937 83% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 12.5979740519 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.64 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 141.0 98.500998004 143% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.5 12.3882235529 157% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.