The author's argument says that recent study on rhesus monkeys unfolded some findings and proposes some supports. Nonetheless, the ideas presented in the arguments are not convincing and in what follows the most compelling controversies are going to be addressed.
First, the reading passage mentions that eighteen monkeys are considered as experimental sample for further results. However, the number of conclusions from that small community is not reliable. Indeed, if scholars want to connect the level of activities in animals to the humans, they should examine a lot of species. In this regard, a new experimental data, from Stanford University, shows that every community sample should at least contain 100 species. Hence, the survey is not trustworthy and much more samples should be added.
Second, the author's argument asserts that the function of the hormone cortisol in monkey is the same as human beings and it yields high activity. Nevertheless, by having a look at common and most reliable experiments it can be shows that mice results are more comparable to the humans that monkeys. Actually, whenever a researcher wants to validate his or her numerical or analytical results, he or she uses a mouse as experimental sample. Even though that at the first glance, it seems that monkeys are genetically the nearest animal to humans, but, mice are common. Therefore, monkeys' results does not meet the standard for experimental validation.
Third, it has been discussed that in comparison to the monkeys who had had offspring before, first-time mother, during pregnancy, have higher level of cortisol. However, the sophistry and complexity of body is more than that to be obtain such a superficial result. Admittedly, billions of millions of cells, during pregnancy period, are doing activity and the result may belong to other thing. For instance, for firs-time pregnant some other features usually appear like facial spot and laziness which has root from stress and a feeling that has never being experienced. Therefore, the connection between body structure and cortisol is superficial.
In the final analysis, as the above-mentioned examples have illustrated, it is not convincing to assign the activity of monkeys to cortisol by doing some without following standard rules like enough communal samples and the author has to fix the problems.
Essay evaluation report
samples:
https://www.testbig.com/story/gre-argument-essay-topic-2-outline
----------------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 373 350
No. of Characters: 1934 1500
No. of Different Words: 208 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.395 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.185 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.749 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 157 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 116 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.722 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.194 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.283 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.532 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.033 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 5, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
The authors argument says that recent study on rhes...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 13, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...e samples should be added. Second, the authors argument asserts that the function of t...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 68, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: had
...d that in comparison to the monkeys who had had offspring before, first-time mother, du...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 95, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'assigning'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'convince' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: assigning
... have illustrated, it is not convincing to assign the activity of monkeys to cortisol by ...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, hence, however, if, look, may, nevertheless, nonetheless, second, so, therefore, third, as to, at least, for instance
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1991.0 2260.96107784 88% => OK
No of words: 373.0 441.139720559 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.33780160858 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39467950092 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.86007844853 2.78398813304 103% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.581769436997 0.468620217663 124% => OK
syllable_count: 614.7 705.55239521 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.2400547138 57.8364921388 73% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.611111111 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.7222222222 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.72222222222 5.70786347227 135% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.124400834833 0.218282227539 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0381565908339 0.0743258471296 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0448111860644 0.0701772020484 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0701650257674 0.128457276422 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0262494278347 0.0628817314937 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 14.3799401198 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.69 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.54 8.32208582834 115% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 98.500998004 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.