Of the two leading real estate firms in our town — Adams Realty and Fitch Realty — Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty."
In the letter, author specifies about two leading real estate firms, Adams Realty and Fitch Realty. He further compares both with several examples to prove that Adams Realty is more superior that Fitch Realty. While concluding he suggest that for quick service and good price sell one must use Adams Realty. By giving a look at the examples and situation one may be convinced of Adams Realty superiority, although by giving a keen look we will find multiple loop holes and assumptions made by author.
Firstly, author introduces Adams Realty and Fitch Realty as the leading real estate firms. This is some kind of unproven assumption made by author. There can be some other firm leading with respect to these. Have author considered such firm while making his statement? These firms lead may be restricted to certain area. For example, there is some Piyush firm leading in India while these two firms are leading in USA. Thus, authors assumption of imagining these two as leading firms is not supported with any kind of proof.
Furthermore, author assumes that some factors related to real estate business may lead to superiority of firm. While explaining it he says, if one have more real estate agents, his firm is more superior. We contradict this statement by giving an example of OnePlus mobile company were with very few employee the company has reached to such a success. Also he tells that Adams made more revenue last year than Fitch so it will be superior. But he has not specified other than last year statistics or even sources of revenue are also not specified. while adding more points he says faster sell leads to superiority, but there may be case that due to more advertisement Adams has become more popular leaving Fitch behind. These arguments are sufficient to disprove the assumption made.
Author also assumes Adams real estate firm always make a sell quickly and at a good price. There may be a case that it has only gave better service last year as given in letter, but before that it was quite bad at giving service. Even it is possible that some people are happy with service, other may be disheartened. Are such people also taken into consideration? Without considering all points we can not make such vague assumption.
Finally, we would like to make a suggestion to author to specify more strong evidences to reduces the assumption made. This will be helpful for author to convince his friend to take service from Adams real estate firm.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 12 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 423 350
No. of Characters: 2002 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.535 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.733 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.327 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 48 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.625 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.817 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.312 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.17 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 231, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'suggests'.
Suggestion: suggests
... that Fitch Realty. While concluding he suggest that for quick service and good price s...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 213, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'authored'.
Suggestion: authored
...irm leading with respect to these. Have author considered such firm while making his s...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 295, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun employee seems to be countable; consider using: 'few employees'.
Suggestion: few employees
...f OnePlus mobile company were with very few employee the company has reached to such a succe...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 351, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
... company has reached to such a success. Also he tells that Adams made more revenue l...
^^^^
Line 3, column 547, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...rces of revenue are also not specified. while adding more points he says faster sell ...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 128, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'given'.
Suggestion: given
...e. There may be a case that it has only gave better service last year as given in le...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, if, look, may, so, thus, while, even so, for example, kind of, with respect to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 35.0 28.8173652695 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2048.0 2260.96107784 91% => OK
No of words: 423.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84160756501 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53508145475 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41826292484 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.468085106383 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 657.9 705.55239521 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 0.0 8.76447105788 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.2001363634 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.92 119.503703932 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.92 23.324526521 73% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.08 5.70786347227 89% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.307239485004 0.218282227539 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101302074009 0.0743258471296 136% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114937167561 0.0701772020484 164% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187955983629 0.128457276422 146% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0687194262722 0.0628817314937 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 14.3799401198 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 48.3550499002 114% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.42 8.32208582834 89% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 98.500998004 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.