We need to increase the funding for the movie Working Title by 10% in order to ensure a quality product. As you know, we are working with a first-time director, whose only previous experience has been shooting commercials for a shampoo company. Since the advertising business is notoriously wasteful, it stands to reason that our director will expect to be able to shoot take after take, without concern for how much time is being spent on any one scene. In addition, while we have saved money by hiring relatively inexperienced assistant producers and directors, this savings in salary will undoubtedly translate to greater expenditures in paying the actors and unionized crew overtime for the extra hours they will spend on the set waiting for the assistant directors and producers to arrange things. If we don’t get this extra money, the movie is virtually assured to be a failure
The conclusion, "if they don't get extra 10 percent of the money, the movie is virtually assured to be a failure", is based on the evidence that director hired for the movie is only experience in commercials and this will led to extra time on set and hence extra money. The conclusion of the producer depends on three assumption which are studied in this essay.
First assumption of the director is that director is not qualified or experienced enough for the job. This assumption is the central point of the whole argument and it is a big one also. It can be the case that the director is not having any profession experience as the main but has some experience as the assitant director in many big projects. Also if the director was not having any relevant experience then why he or she was hired in the first place? If the producer can clear out this assumption by giving any proof that director is not experienced. Then it will make the argument strong.
Second assumption of the producer is that actors and unionized crew may have to be paid extra. This assumption has two sides to it. First being that director will not be able to finish the movie shooting in time and the second being the crew and actors are paid by per hour system. It may be possible that the director will finish the movie in time as he is not able to evaluate his work during the shoot. Second possibility being that the actor and crew may not be paid on per hour basis and thus no requirement for extra payment. If the two possibilites behind the assumption hold true then it will make the producers argument weak.
Third assumption is that only 10 percent will be enough for both any extra money requirements. This assumption really pushes the project to a cliff as it is possible that an amount more than the extra 10 pecent will be required for extra expenses and payments. If the condition behind the argument is true then this makes the assumption weaker.
In conclusion, the producers argument that extra 10 percent money is required otherwise the movie project will fail is flawed to its very core as shown in three paragraphs above. More evidence is needed for clearing out the assumptions. If, producer is able to provide those evidence then, the argument can be evaluated in a much more insightful ways.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 411 350
No. of Characters: 1850 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.503 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.501 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.472 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 106 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 82 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.55 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.831 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.85 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.323 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.54 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
The conclusion, 'if they dont get e...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 45, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... The conclusion, 'if they dont get extra 10 percent of the money, the ...
^^^^
Line 1, column 246, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'lead'
Suggestion: lead
...experience in commercials and this will led to extra time on set and hence extra mo...
^^^
Line 1, column 342, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'assumption' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'assumptions'.
Suggestion: assumptions
...lusion of the producer depends on three assumption which are studied in this essay. ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ption which are studied in this essay. First assumption of the di...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 196, Rule ID: ALSO_SENT_END[1]
Message: 'Also' is not used at the end of the sentence. Use 'as well' instead.
Suggestion: as well
... the whole argument and it is a big one also. It can be the case that the director i...
^^^^
Line 3, column 362, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...assitant director in many big projects. Also if the director was not having any rele...
^^^^
Line 3, column 471, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...he or she was hired in the first place? If the producer can clear out this assumpt...
^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n it will make the argument strong. Second assumption of the producer is tha...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 545, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... thus no requirement for extra payment. If the two possibilites behind the assumpt...
^^
Line 5, column 623, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'producers'' or 'producer's'?
Suggestion: producers'; producer's
...umption hold true then it will make the producers argument weak. Third assu...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...will make the producers argument weak. Third assumption is that only ...
^^^
Line 7, column 75, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... only 10 percent will be enough for both any extra money requirements. This assum...
^^
Line 7, column 273, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...quired for extra expenses and payments. If the condition behind the argument is tr...
^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...en this makes the assumption weaker. In conclusion, the producers argument th...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 31, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'producers'' or 'producer's'?
Suggestion: producers'; producer's
...eaker. In conclusion, the producers argument that extra 10 percent money is...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uated in a much more insightful ways.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, if, may, really, second, so, then, third, thus, in conclusion, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 34.0 19.6327345309 173% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 55.5748502994 63% => OK
Nominalization: 26.0 16.3942115768 159% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1906.0 2260.96107784 84% => OK
No of words: 410.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.6487804878 5.12650576532 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49982852243 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56048311176 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 204.123752495 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.409756097561 0.468620217663 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 595.8 705.55239521 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.8578045325 57.8364921388 91% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.3 119.503703932 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.3 5.70786347227 93% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.143161178137 0.218282227539 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0508974280608 0.0743258471296 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0523918852787 0.0701772020484 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0902736649293 0.128457276422 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0218382127553 0.0628817314937 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 14.3799401198 74% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 48.3550499002 123% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.69 12.5979740519 77% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.13 8.32208582834 86% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.