“When the Apogee Company had all its operation in one location, it was more profitable than it is today. Therefore, the Apogee Company should close down its field offices and conduct all its operations from a single location. Such centralization would i

Essay topics:

“When the Apogee Company had all its operation in one location, it was more profitable than it is today. Therefore, the Apogee Company should close down its field offices and conduct all its operations from a single location. Such centralization would improve profitability by cutting costs and helping the company maintain better supervision of employees.”

The author of the argument argues that the company should close down all the field offices and conduct all its operations from a single site. furthermore to prove he states that apogee company was more profitable when it had all its operations in one site. The author also adds that this decision would improve the profits and keep up better supervision of all employees.The underlying argument certainly has merits but due to vague language , weak assumptions the argument is unsubstantiated and deeply flawed. some of the flaws are as follows.

First, the author while stating that the apogee company was more profitable when it had all its operations in one site . The author has not stated that the site criteria was the only criteria for determining profitability . For example, if the company was new and due to extensive advertisements the profit was high then the author while stating that the company was profitable when it had its operations is flawed.

Second, Using the causal relationship of the site and the profits, the author is suggesting to close down all the field offices. The author while stating this has not taken the current scenario into consideration. For Instance, if the field offices are major source of information for the main office. closing down the field offices would have a negative impact to the company.

Third,The author states that centralization will improve profits by cutting costs and will help the company support better supervision . The author has not studied the current scenario into consideration For example, if each of the field offices had a specific set of employees such as Business Development , sales Engineer , sales Director working towards one goal. Mixing these employees would cut their efficiency.

Although as written the argument is categorically unconvincing , the author could strength the argument by adding some detailed study behind the shifting of all field offices to one site. However without this the argument reasoning remains faulty and the argument remains implausible.

In the conclusion, the author presents an interesting but flawed argument . Had the author presented the details as stated above the argument would have been persuasive. As it stands the argument remains weak. Hence, I remain unconvinced

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Average: 6.3 (3 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 143, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Furthermore
... all its operations from a single site. furthermore to prove he states that apogee company ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 143, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: furthermore,
... all its operations from a single site. furthermore to prove he states that apogee company ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 372, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
... up better supervision of all employees.The underlying argument certainly has merit...
^^^
Line 1, column 442, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...nly has merits but due to vague language , weak assumptions the argument is unsubs...
^^
Line 1, column 513, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Some
...t is unsubstantiated and deeply flawed. some of the flaws are as follows. Fi...
^^^^
Line 1, column 513, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...t is unsubstantiated and deeply flawed. some of the flaws are as follows. First, th...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 119, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...en it had all its operations in one site . The author has not stated that the site...
^^
Line 7, column 222, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...y criteria for determining profitability . For example, if the company was new and...
^^
Line 13, column 303, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Closing
...rce of information for the main office. closing down the field offices would have a neg...
^^^^^^^
Line 19, column 6, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , The
...ive impact to the company. Third,The author states that centralization will ...
^^^^
Line 19, column 135, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...p the company support better supervision . The author has not studied the current ...
^^
Line 19, column 307, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...f employees such as Business Development , sales Engineer , sales Director working...
^^
Line 19, column 324, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...as Business Development , sales Engineer , sales Director working towards one goal...
^^
Line 25, column 63, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...e argument is categorically unconvincing , the author could strength the argument ...
^^
Line 25, column 189, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...fting of all field offices to one site. However without this the argument reasoning rem...
^^^^^^^
Line 27, column 74, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...sents an interesting but flawed argument . Had the author presented the details as...
^^
Line 27, column 171, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...he argument would have been persuasive. As it stands the argument remains weak. He...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, second, so, then, third, while, for example, for instance, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 55.5748502994 52% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1954.0 2260.96107784 86% => OK
No of words: 364.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.36813186813 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36792674256 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82583401854 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.46978021978 0.468620217663 100% => OK
syllable_count: 597.6 705.55239521 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 61.2131317611 57.8364921388 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.7 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.2 23.324526521 78% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.85 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.355926213911 0.218282227539 163% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.117112387969 0.0743258471296 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.156010709417 0.0701772020484 222% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.181797975664 0.128457276422 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.15162444219 0.0628817314937 241% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.3799401198 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.3550499002 110% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 366 350
No. of Characters: 1876 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.374 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.126 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.705 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 145 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.529 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.486 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.377 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.639 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.096 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5