The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
From the beggining of time, collaboration helped us survive and flourish as a specie. I strongly agree with the statement and argue that the ability to work in a teams is a very pretious skill to attain and a much more important element than competition. In this essay I will develop my argument basing it on two main reasons.
First of all, the majority of institutions nowadays value and even require the prospect graduates to be able to work well wih his peers. For instance, I was researching a plethora of job opportunities and found out that ninety percent of employers have this point as a main requirement. More specifically, in investment banking, even though there is a highly comptetitive atmosphere, the only way to attain high peaks is by relying on your colegues. Usually, in the morning all the employees sit at the table and discuss the main transaction that should be done, and the complexity of the process increases if not being done in a complete synergy. The point afore-mentioned illustrates the idea that nowadays the majority of industries' employees perform their jobs in teams even though competition persists.
Secondly, by instilling a sense of cooperation, we eliminate the effect of "putting a stick in the wheel" of your teammate. In other words, the society should be educated in way that no one impedes someone's else success even though this would put yourself on a higher ladder. For example, a trivial school project demands pupils to work in groups, but usually the job is done individually and everybody puts effort for theri own benefit, not for the team's as a whole. One might say that this is a good idea, as everybody will perform ath their maximum capabilities and the project will be acomplished succesfully. However, this situations brings problems like "lack of delegation" or "working on the same points twice and neglectiong other". But the most important detrimental part is that students might impede the performance of others so that his job is put in a better light. The elements above show that if there is a lack of cooperation spirit, competition portrains a devastating effect.
One might say that competition is the main driver of the society. However we would have never succeded as human beings if we have not cooperated in the first place. We used to hunt together and protect each other from other predators. If only competition was in place, I would not be writting right now this essay.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 161, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a team' or simply 'teams'?
Suggestion: a team; teams
...t and argue that the ability to work in a teams is a very pretious skill to attain and ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 634, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ll be acomplished succesfully. However, this situations brings problems like 'l...
^^^^
Line 13, column 67, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...tion is the main driver of the society. However we would have never succeded as human b...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, still, well, for example, for instance, first of all, in other words, in the first place
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 14.8657303371 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 33.0505617978 103% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 58.6224719101 82% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 12.9106741573 132% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2077.0 2235.4752809 93% => OK
No of words: 416.0 442.535393258 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.99278846154 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51620172871 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00717887211 2.79657885939 108% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 215.323595506 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.552884615385 0.4932671777 112% => OK
syllable_count: 648.0 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9023045176 60.3974514979 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.315789474 118.986275619 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.8947368421 23.4991977007 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.10526315789 5.21951772744 136% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.83258426966 166% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.105258357662 0.243740707755 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0283656168408 0.0831039109588 34% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0394568072233 0.0758088955206 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0520482022744 0.150359130593 35% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0440082217373 0.0667264976115 66% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 14.1392134831 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.8420337079 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.1639044944 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.38706741573 106% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 100.480337079 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.