Claim: The best way to understand the character of a society is to examine the character of the men and women that the society chooses as its heroes or its role models.
Reason: Heroes and role models reveal a society's highest ideals.
it is common knowledge that the role models of a society represent the perfect figures of a community's most desired. However, to conclude that the best way to understand the character of a society is equivalent to examining characters of the role models is misleading. I disagree with the statement because there are multiple reasons contending the statement that are pervasive and cannot be ignored.
First, role models, as glorious figures depicted often by media and press, are epitomes of likely political propaganda. Driven back to the 1960s where lei feng, a driver at a military facility, was advocated and deified by the chinese press, people were encouraged to learn his deeds of altruism and urged to behave just like him. lei feng was mostly wide known for his selflessness in his anecdotes and was commemorated for his abrupt death in a car accident hitting a tree at a very young age. Though many of his alleged anecdotes were proved to be fabricated, information accessible by civilians of my parents' generation were limited to what the media would disseminate, as a result of political strategy. The government was hoping that by doing this, the citizens would value spartan lifestyle more, and provide to the community unconditionally. it was assumed that this virtue will in turn, help alleviate the poor economic condition in China in the 60s where most of the country were suffering from indigience and famine. lei feng, as a role model till this day, is hardly a representation of what it is of the main character of chineses since the condition and lifestyle has dramatically changed. Thus, I believe that due to the inperceptibility of the dissemination of role models, it can be hardly concluded that they possess the emblem of the characters of an ethnicity group.
To make things worse, many of the role models that were established under a blended circumstance are of natures that surpress humanity. many religions, for example, frequently require their most piety believers to behave in an austere and ascetic manner. Monks in Tibet starving themselves to be focused on absorbing the jingles, are often hallowed and lionized by believers. Although it might be out of good purpose to conduct demeanors like this, it is nontheless against human nature where to feed and keep warm of oneself is the pristine pursuit. If the statement were to be agreed, then characters of human beings are being conceivably belied.
Lastly, one cannot deny that role models are mostly under extreme conditions or of unique nature in which they have achieved deeds that are rare, since these are actually what made them role models. heros and role models are the significant minority of a society, albeit the light shed by them are inspiring. The discrepancy between the population of such role models and ordinary people of average lives makes it hard to determine the character of one community by looking only at the role models. heros are made existing, because most people are not heros and need to gain the encourage to be a better person by the fact that they are immersed by these information and urged by what is valued characteristic based on a consensus that the public has reached.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
it is common knowledge that the role model...
^^
Line 1, column 299, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...isleading. I disagree with the statement because there are multiple reasons conte...
^^
Line 5, column 41, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[9]
Message: The adverb 'often' is usually put before the verb 'depicted'.
Suggestion: often depicted
...First, role models, as glorious figures depicted often by media and press, are epitomes of lik...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 332, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Lei
...uism and urged to behave just like him. lei feng was mostly wide known for his self...
^^^
Line 5, column 851, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ovide to the community unconditionally. it was assumed that this virtue will in tu...
^^
Line 5, column 1029, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Lei
...e suffering from indigience and famine. lei feng, as a role model till this day, is...
^^^
Line 9, column 137, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Many
... are of natures that surpress humanity. many religions, for example, frequently requ...
^^^^
Line 13, column 200, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Heros
...re actually what made them role models. heros and role models are the significant min...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 500, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Heros
...ity by looking only at the role models. heros are made existing, because most people ...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 576, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...t people are not heros and need to gain the encourage to be a better person by the fact that ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 650, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...n by the fact that they are immersed by these information and urged by what is valued characteris...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, first, however, if, lastly, look, so, then, thus, for example, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 41.0 19.5258426966 210% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.4196629213 64% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 14.8657303371 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.3162921348 150% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 33.0505617978 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 80.0 58.6224719101 136% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 12.9106741573 108% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2678.0 2235.4752809 120% => OK
No of words: 537.0 442.535393258 121% => OK
Chars per words: 4.98696461825 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81386128306 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80523457449 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 276.0 215.323595506 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.513966480447 0.4932671777 104% => OK
syllable_count: 884.7 704.065955056 126% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 3.10617977528 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.2370786517 99% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 23.0359550562 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.301210636 60.3974514979 68% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.9 118.986275619 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.85 23.4991977007 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.2 5.21951772744 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 7.80617977528 141% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 10.2758426966 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 5.13820224719 136% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.220729699008 0.243740707755 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0731750673403 0.0831039109588 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0982592655551 0.0758088955206 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.15914617412 0.150359130593 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.115198590362 0.0667264976115 173% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.1392134831 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.8420337079 92% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.1743820225 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.96 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.31 8.38706741573 111% => OK
difficult_words: 149.0 100.480337079 148% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.2143820225 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.