Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take In developing and su

Essay topics:

Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

Education is one of the important policies in a nation, and the success of educating the youth can shape the successful future for the nation. The statement claims that the formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free. However, I totally disagree with the argument based on two following reasons.

First of all, some people may argue that the formal education in school trains students to fit in society as a group, and this training would restrain their spirits and minds. However, fitting in the group does not imply to limit people's imagination and behavior. To be specific, the lessons in school are designed for group cooperation, and students can learn to work with others. From a British research, the learning process of school in early age can help students to fit in society for their future life. Furthermore, a group of people can implement a large scale of project rather than limit in individual based. This is the reason why I refute that the argument of teamwork directly leads to retrain students' thinking.

More important of all, the formal education enables us to think independently and critically, which can set our minds and spirits free. It is the experiments in science class teach us how to verify the fact steps by steps, and it is the debating activities in society class inspire us to analyze the social issues. For example, perhaps for those who do not have a change to accept formal education, they may accept all the thing they receive from news, because they do not have any experience from classes to analyze the "facts" or maybe they would trust all of the advertisements for health related products since they do not understand how to verify the information from searching and studying research. Thus, education can help students improve their ability to think rather than restrain their mind.

In summary, from above mentioned, education can equip us the ability to cooperate with others and think independently, since I strongly disagree with the claim from the original arguments.

Votes
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 566, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...s;facts' or maybe they would trust all of the advertisements for health related produ...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, furthermore, however, if, may, so, thus, for example, in summary, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 19.5258426966 31% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 33.0505617978 82% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 58.6224719101 85% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 12.9106741573 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1733.0 2235.4752809 78% => OK
No of words: 345.0 442.535393258 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.0231884058 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3097767484 4.55969084622 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67781852172 2.79657885939 96% => OK
Unique words: 177.0 215.323595506 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.513043478261 0.4932671777 104% => OK
syllable_count: 526.5 704.065955056 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.2370786517 69% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 23.0359550562 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.578268575 60.3974514979 128% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.785714286 118.986275619 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.6428571429 23.4991977007 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.07142857143 5.21951772744 116% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 5.13820224719 39% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.196151505787 0.243740707755 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.081999403012 0.0831039109588 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.103591663839 0.0758088955206 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.131013550029 0.150359130593 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0812661221443 0.0667264976115 122% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 14.1392134831 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.8420337079 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.13 12.1639044944 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.53 8.38706741573 102% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 100.480337079 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.2143820225 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.