Formal education tends to restrain our minds and spirits rather than set them free.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
Over the course of time, education has been considered to be one of the most crucial element in a person's life. Also, literacy is a major factor for evaluating a country's growth. However, the prompt claims that the formal education tries to limit the creativity and ability to express free thoughts in an individual. I mostly agree with the position for two main reasons, which I will elucidate below. But, I do concede that formal education teaches us values which are necessary for a person to blend in the society.
To begin, in the recent years, the competition to acquire the best education have risen significantly. This have caused negative effects on the students as well as the society. The notion that a person cannot achieve a good career if they did not go to the best college is troubling the youth to a great extent. In countries like India, China and USA which are highly populated, this issue is exacerbated. Many students waste years preparing just for the entrance exams. Studies shows there is an increase in stress and anxiety among students over the last decades. The educational institutes are taking advantage of this situation by fictitious promises. The parents are enrolling their children in extra classes at an earlier stage, in the hopes that the students will get an extra advantage. All these factors have affected the students in their developing years and this can be blame on the current education system.
Secondly, the qualities of creativity, passion, free thoughts, etc. are not appreciated. Due to strenuous competition, many students give up on their hobbies and passion. Little to less attention is paid by parents on these matters. Students are well institutionalized. Even after getting into the best universities and colleges the student remain largely unsatisfied and few of them even drops out. Even the ones that don't drop out remains at large dispassionate with their jobs. This result in degradation of quality of work in the industries. While, many people like Einstein and Newton did not complete their formal education and are still consider to be very successful. Hence, it is plausible to conclude that formal education do refrain out minds.
However, I do believe it is important for children to receive educations because it not only provide us with knowledge but also teaches us values necessary to sustain in society. The common thing which is found among robbers and thieves is that they lack educations. Education could have help them land a job at least so that they didn't have to resort to this. Other principles like punctuality, consistency are taught to students in schools. This help students to become a better person. Thus, it can be said that even though acquiring education is filed with problems, it is important for a person to have a basic education.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 99, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...be one of the most crucial element in a persons life. Also, literacy is a major factor ...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 420, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...them even drops out. Even the ones that dont drop out remains at large dispassionate...
^^^^
Line 5, column 645, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'considered'.
Suggestion: considered
...te their formal education and are still consider to be very successful. Hence, it is pla...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 332, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...p them land a job at least so that they didnt have to resort to this. Other principle...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, second, secondly, so, still, thus, well, while, at least, as well as, to a great extent
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.5258426966 123% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.4196629213 48% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 14.8657303371 74% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 33.0505617978 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 58.6224719101 113% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 12.9106741573 139% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2363.0 2235.4752809 106% => OK
No of words: 472.0 442.535393258 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0063559322 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6610686524 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74122005346 2.79657885939 98% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 215.323595506 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.546610169492 0.4932671777 111% => OK
syllable_count: 744.3 704.065955056 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 6.24550561798 160% => OK
Article: 7.0 4.99550561798 140% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.10617977528 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.38483146067 114% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 30.0 20.2370786517 148% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 23.0359550562 65% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.4078317958 60.3974514979 57% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 78.7666666667 118.986275619 66% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.7333333333 23.4991977007 67% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.93333333333 5.21951772744 75% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 10.2758426966 195% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13338772899 0.243740707755 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0334587969113 0.0831039109588 40% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0365492572146 0.0758088955206 48% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0908029238212 0.150359130593 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0455330291998 0.0667264976115 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 14.1392134831 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.25 48.8420337079 115% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.48 12.1639044944 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.7 8.38706741573 104% => OK
difficult_words: 129.0 100.480337079 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 11.8971910112 88% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 11.2143820225 71% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.