The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The past has shown that humans are curious creatures, who are bound to explore and find a way which eases their work. The prompt states that the primary goal of technology advancement is to increase efficiency and leisure time. In my opinion, I moderately agree with the statement and argue that this suggestion is true upto some extent for three following two reasons.
Firstly, Increase in the advancement of technology would lead to solving many crucial problems. For instance, the recently spread virus named covid has taken a toll on the population, at some point,it also became an extinction threat to humans, the advancement would not only be helpful for health purposes but also in many areas where we lack the technology to tackle problems, However, these problems might not be related to more leisure time but may be related to the increase in efficiency of the people.
Secondly, sometimes efficiency is directly related to more technological advancement. For instance, work done by a human in a day could be done by a machine in hours or sometimes in minutes, although the machine may be more efficient, it cannot be replaced completely in some areas, where it needs some supervision. Thus the help of machines indirectly mostly increases the efficiency of a person and also helps in the advancement of technology.
Of course, some argue that the primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time. However, as stated above, it might not always be the case as the best way is to always have a more balanced kind of approach.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 198, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , it
... a toll on the population, at some point,it also became an extinction threat to hum...
^^^
Line 5, column 317, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...areas, where it needs some supervision. Thus the help of machines indirectly mostly ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, may, second, secondly, so, thus, for instance, kind of, of course, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.4196629213 72% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 14.8657303371 47% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 16.0 33.0505617978 48% => OK
Preposition: 35.0 58.6224719101 60% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 12.0 12.9106741573 93% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1344.0 2235.4752809 60% => OK
No of words: 270.0 442.535393258 61% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97777777778 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.05360046442 4.55969084622 89% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80132243903 2.79657885939 100% => OK
Unique words: 148.0 215.323595506 69% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.548148148148 0.4932671777 111% => OK
syllable_count: 437.4 704.065955056 62% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 20.2370786517 49% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 92.3068794836 60.3974514979 153% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.4 118.986275619 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.0 23.4991977007 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.6 5.21951772744 222% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.83258426966 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.343017662074 0.243740707755 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.145622467893 0.0831039109588 175% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.11989673571 0.0758088955206 158% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.214343330033 0.150359130593 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.076244539527 0.0667264976115 114% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.1392134831 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.1743820225 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.6 8.38706741573 103% => OK
difficult_words: 62.0 100.480337079 62% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.