The surest indicator of a great nation is represented not by the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists, but by the general welfare of its people.
When deciding the greatness of a country, one might look at the level of economic development or the status of social welfare as a major standard. However, there is a fierce disagreement among people, often among politicians, about which one comes first, the achievements of leaders or the welfare of people. In this essay, I will argue why the welfare of the general public is a better indicator of a good nation.
Admittedly, the achievement by leaders can indicate the greatness of a nation. When looking at popular countries, like the United States or Italy, they tend to have great leaders and artists whose achievement in one’s field is admirable. For instance, in the United States, Abraham Lincoln’s Emancipation Proclamation enabled the equal citizenship for the African-Americans. His contribution for the equal citizenship in the United States is still admired and he was selected as the most admired president of the country. In addition, in Italy, many people admire the country where the home of great artists such as Leonardo da Vinci and Michelangelo. Therefore, great nations are those who had great leaders to be admired by people.
However, the welfare of people is a more reliable standard determining the greatness of a nation. For example, in the 1970s of South Korea, Park Jung-hee was using more power than the president are supposed to be. To enlengthen his presidency, he corrected Korean Constitution several times and suppressed the voice from the opposition party. Even though his great achievement of rapid economic development, his authoritarian government degraded the virtue of democracy severely and the illegal behavior is criticized by people who see the history. When achievements of elites are emphasized as an indicator of a great nation, it might justify leaders' infringement on the value of democracy. Besides, countries in northern Europe, such as Finland and Sweden, they have a higher status of welfare. People living in those countries have the higher rate of education and less rate of inequality among people. Elderly can gain enough amount of income which enables them to remain healthy in their late years. This country often shows a higher level of happiness and satisfaction for one’s life. For this reason, people's welfare is much more reliable standard to determine the greatness of a nation.
Nevertheless, I cannot fully agree that those two indicators of great nations are separated. Rather, they are inextricably intertwined that they should be considered together. In most countries where the social services are well provided, they might have great achievements in different sectors. For instance, in Finland, they are well-known for the excellent welfare of its people but this could be achieved by the well-thought education policies by its politicians. Besides, in the 18th century, thanks to the development of the steam engine by James Watt, U.K could develop more rapidly than other countries and initiated Industrial Revolution. If scientists were not endeavoring to the invention of steam engine, people in U.K would not have enjoyed its status as the world leading country. Besides, the invention of the light bulb by Thomas Edison could enable people to do something even in the night time. As it is proved in these examples, the welfare and achievement influence each other.
In sum, the welfare of general public and achievement of leaders are closely interconnected that it seems implausible to argue for one option.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
welfare is much more reliable standard
welfare is a much more reliable standard
Sentence: To enlengthen his presidency, he corrected Korean Constitution several times and suppressed the voice from the opposition party.
Error: enlengthen Suggestion: lengthen
flaws:
1. you were developing the topic to:
The surest indicator of the greatness of a nation is represented not by the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists, but by the general welfare of its people.
while the actual topic is:
The surest indicator of a great nation is represented not by the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists, but by the general welfare of its people.
Every country has some greatness, but it doesn't mean it is a great nation. We may say it is a good country with general welfare.
2. There are a lot of examples in the essay. Need more argument.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 28 15
No. of Words: 562 350
No. of Characters: 2860 1500
No. of Different Words: 266 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.869 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.089 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.851 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 219 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 161 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 106 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 79 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.071 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.23 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.536 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.271 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.442 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.094 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
When deciding the greatness of a country...
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Line 1, column 374, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...ay, I will argue why the welfare of the general public is a better indicator of a good nation....
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...a better indicator of a good nation. Admittedly, the achievement by leaders c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...eat leaders to be admired by people. However, the welfare of people is a more...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...determine the greatness of a nation. Nevertheless, I cannot fully agree that ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 576, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: K
...nt of the steam engine by James Watt, U.K could develop more rapidly than other c...
^
Line 7, column 744, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: K
... invention of steam engine, people in U.K would not have enjoyed its status as th...
^
Line 9, column 25, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...each other. In sum, the welfare of general public and achievement of leaders are closely ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... implausible to argue for one option.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, first, however, if, look, nevertheless, so, still, then, therefore, well, for example, for instance, in addition, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.5258426966 118% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 76.0 58.6224719101 130% => OK
Nominalization: 26.0 12.9106741573 201% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2962.0 2235.4752809 132% => OK
No of words: 560.0 442.535393258 127% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28928571429 5.05705443957 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.8645985582 4.55969084622 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96617839749 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 273.0 215.323595506 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.4875 0.4932671777 99% => OK
syllable_count: 943.2 704.065955056 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59117977528 107% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 6.24550561798 192% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.77640449438 0% => OK
Preposition: 12.0 4.38483146067 274% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 28.0 20.2370786517 138% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 32.536792361 60.3974514979 54% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 105.785714286 118.986275619 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 23.4991977007 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.82142857143 5.21951772744 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 7.80617977528 115% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.83258426966 207% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253432889978 0.243740707755 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0728494856189 0.0831039109588 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0699754388573 0.0758088955206 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.151087048584 0.150359130593 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0347223701548 0.0667264976115 52% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 14.1392134831 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.8420337079 87% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.1743820225 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.4 12.1639044944 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.58 8.38706741573 102% => OK
difficult_words: 140.0 100.480337079 139% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.