While some leaders in government, sports, industry, and other areas attribute their success to a well-developed sense of competition, a society can better prepare its young people for leadership by instilling in them a sense of cooperation."
Since the moment you enter high school, you are told that learning to work together in teams is a must. In order to survive college, and to survive in the the real world, you must learn to cooperate and build a sense of teamwork throughout your career and lifetime. Through teamwork, many skills are attained, but a major skill is that of leadership. Therefore, it is true that instilling youth with cooperation is the best way to prepare the youth of tomorrow for leadership positions.
A great leader knows when to ask for help and how to divide tasks within its members. A bad leader competes against its members and gets nowhere. Take for example the history of finding the structure of dna. throughout this rivaling tirage to discover that dna is a helix structure, various figures competed, and even cheated, to reach the final goal. In the end, the two people to discover the structure of dna ended up stealing the success from Rosalind franklin who had used math and x-ray crystalography to picture the first dna structure. if Crick and Watson had worked together wirth franklin, they would have discovered the whole thing more quickly. they would have been awarded together for the nobel prize and would be instilled in history for their discovery. Apart from that, they would become the leaders of science. this is seen throughout science and research. discoveries that could lead to cures for disastorous diseases are often kept to themselves because of the competitive nature of the field. No one wants to "get scooped". but if scientists worked together and had a sense of cooperation, they would be able to find answers to inumerable questions. this can only be done if society teaches youth to collaborate, to work together to find the big picture because that is the best way to become a leader.
however, some may argue that leadership is built by competition. success is sometimes defined as "who came first". A leader, on the other hand, is someone who realizes what needs to achieved, and works to reach that goal. cooperation may be the only answer to achieving success, and a great leader realizes that, and that competition will not help one reach their goal. some may say that competition fuels a person to achieve success, but that is only a temporary feeling that fades. team work, however, is not momentary and uses the strengths of every team member--not just one person--to overcome adversaries.
Overall, instilling the youth with a sense of cooperation helps them become stronger leaders, than by instilling them with a sense of competition. working together allows strengths to come amass, and relies on the knowledge of many members.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 152, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...r to survive college, and to survive in the the real world, you must learn to cooperate...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 152, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...r to survive college, and to survive in the the real world, you must learn to cooperate...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 209, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Throughout
...istory of finding the structure of dna. throughout this rivaling tirage to discover that d...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 220, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...inding the structure of dna. throughout this rivaling tirage to discover that dna is...
^^^^
Line 5, column 545, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: If
...phy to picture the first dna structure. if Crick and Watson had worked together wi...
^^
Line 5, column 658, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...iscovered the whole thing more quickly. they would have been awarded together for th...
^^^^
Line 5, column 830, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...ey would become the leaders of science. this is seen throughout science and research...
^^^^
Line 5, column 876, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Discoveries
...s seen throughout science and research. discoveries that could lead to cures for disastorou...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1056, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...o one wants to 'get scooped'. but if scientists worked together and had a...
^^^
Line 5, column 1183, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
... find answers to inumerable questions. this can only be done if society teaches you...
^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... the best way to become a leader. however, some may argue that leadership is buil...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 66, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Success
...hat leadership is built by competition. success is sometimes defined as 'who came ...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 234, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Cooperation
...achieved, and works to reach that goal. cooperation may be the only answer to achieving suc...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 382, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Some
...ion will not help one reach their goal. some may say that competition fuels a person...
^^^^
Line 9, column 391, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'saith', 'says'.
Suggestion: saith; says
...not help one reach their goal. some may say that competition fuels a person to achi...
^^^
Line 9, column 496, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Team
...is only a temporary feeling that fades. team work, however, is not momentary and use...
^^^^
Line 13, column 148, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Working
...lling them with a sense of competition. working together allows strengths to come amass...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, so, still, therefore, apart from, for example, it is true, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 14.8657303371 128% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.3162921348 159% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 33.0505617978 100% => OK
Preposition: 68.0 58.6224719101 116% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 12.9106741573 77% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2251.0 2235.4752809 101% => OK
No of words: 451.0 442.535393258 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.9911308204 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.60833598836 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72010125564 2.79657885939 97% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 215.323595506 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.529933481153 0.4932671777 107% => OK
syllable_count: 680.4 704.065955056 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 9.0 1.77640449438 507% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.38483146067 205% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.2370786517 124% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 39.7450676185 60.3974514979 66% => OK
Chars per sentence: 90.04 118.986275619 76% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.04 23.4991977007 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.24 5.21951772744 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 7.80617977528 218% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.83258426966 186% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.199038473707 0.243740707755 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.048907121956 0.0831039109588 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.04666098804 0.0758088955206 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.1173755384 0.150359130593 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0295477538245 0.0667264976115 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 14.1392134831 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.37 12.1639044944 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 100.480337079 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.8971910112 76% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.