The chart below shows participation in certain leisure activities by children in Australia.

Essay topics:

The chart below shows participation in certain leisure activities by children in Australia.

This bar chart shows the participation of 5 to 14 years old boys and girls in 5 leisure activities (Stake boarding, bike riding, watching TV, Computer games and art and craft) in percentage.

Overall,both boys and girls shows a great interest in watching TV/Videos which is about 90%,whereas boys shows least interest in art and craft which is about 30% and girls shows least interest in skate boarding which is about 25%

Both boys and girls have show some great interest in watching TV/Videos which is about 90%. They also having great interest in electronic games which is about 80% for boys and 60% for girls.Both of them have interest in bike riding as well which is about 70% for boys and 60% for girls.

On the other side both boys and girls have least interest in skate riding activity which is about 30% for boys and 25% for girls.girls shows some more interest than boys in art and craft which is about 40% and 25% respectively.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 8, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , both
... art and craft in percentage. Overall,both boys and girls shows a great interest i...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 106, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[3]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'shows the least'.
Suggestion: shows the least
.../Videos which is about 90%,whereas boys shows least interest in art and craft which is abou...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 173, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[3]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'shows the least'.
Suggestion: shows the least
... and craft which is about 30% and girls shows least interest in skate boarding which is abo...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 191, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Both
...is about 80% for boys and 60% for girls.Both of them have interest in bike riding as...
^^^^
Line 7, column 39, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[3]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'have the least'.
Suggestion: have the least
... On the other side both boys and girls have least interest in skate riding activity which...
^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, so, well, whereas

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 7.0 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 6.8 191% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 3.15609756098 253% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 3.0 5.60731707317 54% => OK
Preposition: 22.0 33.7804878049 65% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 3.97073170732 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 779.0 965.302439024 81% => OK
No of words: 167.0 196.424390244 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.66467065868 4.92477711251 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.59483629437 3.73543355544 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.39549399509 2.65546596893 90% => OK
Unique words: 71.0 106.607317073 67% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.425149700599 0.547539520022 78% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 209.7 283.868780488 74% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 1.53170731707 131% => OK
Article: 0.0 4.33902439024 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.07073170732 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 3.36585365854 30% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 4.0 8.94146341463 45% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 41.0 22.4926829268 182% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 54.4581261154 43.030603864 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 194.75 112.824112599 173% => OK
Words per sentence: 41.75 22.9334400587 182% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.75 5.23603664747 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 1.69756097561 295% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 3.70975609756 54% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 1.13902439024 88% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.09268292683 24% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0944030728964 0.215688989381 44% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0836856590528 0.103423049105 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0815870945313 0.0843802449381 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0889386556374 0.15604864568 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.077025608312 0.0819641961636 94% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 21.4 13.2329268293 162% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.24 61.2550243902 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.51609756098 135% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.7 10.3012195122 152% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.64 11.4140731707 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.47 8.06136585366 93% => OK
difficult_words: 19.0 40.7170731707 47% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 11.4329268293 157% => OK
gunning_fog: 18.4 10.9970731707 167% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 11.0658536585 163% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.