YOu are appling for membership at a local sport club write to the club Explian why you would like to join describe how you heard about the place describe some of sports or activities you would be interested in

Essay topics:

YOu are appling for membership at a local sport club. write to the club.
Explian why you would like to join
describe how you heard about the place
describe some of sports or activities you would be interested in

Dear Sir or Madam,

I am JOhn, dweller of Huston Street New York, penning down this epistle to apply a membership of your sport club. As I am suffering from sever obesity due to sedentary lifestyle, thus my physician has recommended me to join a fitness club to get rid of extreme fat.

Although you have spent colossal amounts of fund on advertisements, I came to know about it from one of my friends. My friend was also suffering from the same problem but he has successfully cut down his weight by 25 Kgs with in short span of time and now he is leading a healthy life.

Even though there are multiple sports activities carried out in your club under the surveillance of professional instructors , I aspire to join swimming. I know that swimming is one of those aerobic activities which would be conductive in reducing my body weight briskly. Moreover, being a professional , I have undue strain on my mind so I cogitate that Yoga would definitely act as stress buster for me.

I would be grateful if you let me know about your membership options and arrange a time for me to come and see you fitness
club.

Your faithfully,
JOhn

Votes
Average: 4.3 (2 votes)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 24, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... extreme fat. Although you have spent colossal amounts of fund on advertisemen...
^^
Line 7, column 125, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...surveillance of professional instructors , I aspire to join swimming. I know that ...
^^
Line 7, column 303, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... briskly. Moreover, being a professional , I have undue strain on my mind so I cog...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, moreover, so, thus, well, in short

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 13.1623246493 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 7.85571142285 38% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 3.0 7.30460921844 41% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 32.0 24.0651302605 133% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 31.0 41.998997996 74% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 8.3376753507 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 948.0 1615.20841683 59% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 204.0 315.596192385 65% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.64705882353 5.12529762239 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.77926670891 4.20363070211 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76013458302 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Unique words: 136.0 176.041082164 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.666666666667 0.561755894193 119% => OK
syllable_count: 288.0 506.74238477 57% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.60771543086 87% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.76152304609 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 16.0721442886 56% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9026593377 49.4020404114 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 105.333333333 106.682146367 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6666666667 20.7667163134 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.44444444444 7.06120827912 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.244886536908 0.244688304435 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0919084732742 0.084324248473 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0862892284662 0.0667982634062 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.144368441956 0.151304729494 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0779720598111 0.056905535591 137% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 13.0946893788 90% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 50.2224549098 132% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 11.3001002004 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.99 12.4159519038 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.58950901804 94% => OK
difficult_words: 43.0 78.4519038076 55% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 9.78957915832 143% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.7795591182 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.