Children are experiencing the increasing educational, social and commercial pressure. What are the causes? What measures do you think can be taken to reduce them?

Essay topics:

Children are experiencing the increasing educational, social and commercial pressure. What are the causes? What measures do you think can be taken to reduce them?

Children are under the greater pressure of academic and social skill learning. The primary cause of this phenomenon is the over expectation of parents and the most viable solution to reduce this burden is to raise a public awareness campaign warning adults about the serious consequences of studying too hard.

In many countries, especially in Asia, parents always would like their children to be the best at school. In order to achieve the highest academic outcomes, children must take many additional courses to boost their grades which can help them to enroll in top universities in the world. Moreover, they are also expected to become a perfect student, who can be excellent not only in academics but also in extra curriculums such as music and sports. Therefore, they have to spend most of their time to learn and practice intensively. This results in lacking sleeping and physical activities, which can affect seriously children’s mental, emotional and intellectual development. For example, a recent survey of Queen University showed that 56% of high school students in China are suffering from obesity and depression.

To tackle this problem, the government should launch a publicity campaign in the media and in schools to warn parents about the dangers of studying long hours and not spending enough time for rest. Many parents have not realized the heavy strain they have put on their children as well as the effects of this pressure on the healthy development of children, so they tend to require children trying harder. On the other side, children are also afraid to speak to parents about their difficulties. An awareness campaign could shed some light on this difficult situation and allow children to be more open about it. A similar initiative in Japan resulted in a 54% decrease in students calling in sick to school because of mental fatigue.

In conclusion, the unrealistic expectation of parents is the primary reason to explain why children have to carry the increasing burden of education and social skills training, and we can reduce this pressure by giving the warning messages to parents.

Votes
Average: 8.4 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 48, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[10]
Message: The adverb 'always' is usually put between 'would' and 'like'.
Suggestion: would always like
... countries, especially in Asia, parents always would like their children to be the best at school...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, moreover, so, therefore, well, for example, in conclusion, such as, as well as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 13.1623246493 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 24.0651302605 83% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 41.998997996 148% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1798.0 1615.20841683 111% => OK
No of words: 347.0 315.596192385 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.18155619597 5.12529762239 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31600926901 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73533034093 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 176.041082164 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.567723342939 0.561755894193 101% => OK
syllable_count: 546.3 506.74238477 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 6.0 2.52805611222 237% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.7978074054 49.4020404114 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.428571429 106.682146367 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.7857142857 20.7667163134 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.64285714286 7.06120827912 94% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.67935871743 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.9879759519 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.130827487989 0.244688304435 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0465847968211 0.084324248473 55% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.035302125861 0.0667982634062 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0895356128263 0.151304729494 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0217757546988 0.056905535591 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 13.0946893788 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 50.2224549098 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.06 12.4159519038 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.1 8.58950901804 106% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 78.4519038076 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 9.78957915832 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.7795591182 139% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.