many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time and have health problems as a result Why do many working people not get enough exercise what can be done about this problem | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

Essay topics:

many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

what can be done about this problem

It is believed that many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. In this essay I will examine why do many people who work not get enough exercise.

In the one hand, Working is the important thing that citizen should have to get some money and continue their live become happier, but their activities on duty that spend a lot of time so they can not have enough exercise well it make them get some health problem such as rematic, migran, and headache. For example when I have a lot of work and it spend a lot of time to finish it, and my job require to work in front of computer or laptop it makes my back pain sometimes, and also I often eat unhealthy food such as pizza or fried chicken. Fruthermore when I have some leasure time I prever to use it to enjoy my day such as watching movie or concow with my team mate, and I think exercise was waste more energy so I dont do that.

In the other hand, without excercise it could make their bodies even worse rather than doing a little movement such as stretching their hand, foor and their head I think it's better and easy to do.
for instance My best friend Dony like to do that when break time, he often strengten their hand and their foot, and sometime he ask me to join his gym class, so they don't have any fatal health problem and it will be brilliant solution for who don't have enough time to exercice.

To sum up from where I stand, health problem was very common to people who don't have enough excercise, so they have to make exercise as habbit and make it fun, therefore it make them healthy and their job have maximum result.

Votes

Essay Categories

IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 231, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'makes'?
Suggestion: makes
...ey can not have enough exercise well it make them get some health problem such as re...
^^^^
Line 3, column 349, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'spends'?
Suggestion: spends
...xample when I have a lot of work and it spend a lot of time to finish it, and my job ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 402, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'working'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: working
...f time to finish it, and my job require to work in front of computer or laptop it makes...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 719, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ink exercise was waste more energy so I dont do that. In the other hand, without ...
^^^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: For
...ad I think its better and easy to do. for instance My best friend Dony like to do...
^^^
Line 6, column 129, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'asks'.
Suggestion: asks
...ir hand and their foot, and sometime he ask me to join his gym class, so they dont ...
^^^
Line 6, column 167, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...e ask me to join his gym class, so they dont have any fatal health problem and it wi...
^^^^
Line 6, column 240, Rule ID: IN_WHO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'whom'?
Suggestion: whom
...m and it will be brilliant solution for who dont have enough time to exercice. T...
^^^
Line 6, column 244, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...d it will be brilliant solution for who dont have enough time to exercice. To sum...
^^^^
Line 8, column 76, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...h problem was very common to people who dont have enough excercise, so they have to ...
^^^^
Line 8, column 174, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'makes'?
Suggestion: makes
...as habbit and make it fun, therefore it make them healthy and their job have maximum...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, i think, such as, as a result, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 13.1623246493 38% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 10.4138276553 192% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 24.0651302605 204% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 27.0 41.998997996 64% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1366.0 1615.20841683 85% => OK
No of words: 320.0 315.596192385 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.26875 5.12529762239 83% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22948505376 4.20363070211 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.09000598085 2.80592935109 74% => OK
Unique words: 166.0 176.041082164 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.51875 0.561755894193 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 437.4 506.74238477 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.60771543086 87% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 5.43587174349 37% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 7.0 0.809619238477 865% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 8.0 16.0721442886 50% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 40.0 20.2975951904 197% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 65.2188623023 49.4020404114 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 170.75 106.682146367 160% => OK
Words per sentence: 40.0 20.7667163134 193% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.375 7.06120827912 175% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.01903807615 219% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.67935871743 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.453848316097 0.244688304435 185% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.243991056963 0.084324248473 289% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.214466551191 0.0667982634062 321% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.278302373159 0.151304729494 184% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.252041347606 0.056905535591 443% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.7 13.0946893788 143% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.8 50.2224549098 95% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.5 11.3001002004 146% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.08 12.4159519038 65% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.58950901804 92% => OK
difficult_words: 46.0 78.4519038076 59% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 17.0 9.78957915832 174% => OK
gunning_fog: 18.0 10.1190380762 178% => OK
text_standard: 17.0 10.7795591182 158% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Essay evaluations by e-grader

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, so, therefore, well, for example, for instance, i think, such as, as a result, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments