Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws attention to problems.Others think celebrities make the problems less important.Discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay topics:

Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws attention to problems.Others think celebrities make the problems less important.Discuss both views and give your opinion

It is argued that well-known people’s involvement in global aid organizations attracts the attention of the community.While some people suppose that their participation may downplay the significance of problems, I would argue that this trend could bring about enormous and positive changes to society.

On the one hand, famous people can lessen the importance of problems. One reason is that most people often consider the main purpose of celebrities’ support as a way to enhance their reputations.In an effort to attract the attention of society, a number of important people try to be involved in as many volunteer projects as possible without any particular passion or interest in those.Furthermore, the association with celebrities may trivialize the serious work of international aid organizations since the focusof the public may be shifted away from this endeavour to the fame and public image of the celebrity concerned.Consequently, we sometimes have to question their motives for involvement.

On the other hand, I strongly believe that celebrities can bring meaningful changes to social activities.Firstly, they have a huge number of fans who are inspired by their actions.For example, when My Tam- a Vietnamese legendary singer - took part in a project to help underprivileged children in mountainous areas,thousands of youngsters from her fan clubs joined in this project by donating money and working as volunteers thanks to her encouragement.Secondly, celebrities are often trusted by both local and international communities, which may lead to success in raising the profile of aid organizations.As a result , more people learn about projects and donate money or volunteer to help either practically or in fund-raising.

In conclusion, although there are some drawbacks to celebrity participation in international aid organizations, it seems to me that it is more advantageous for the community that they take part in voluntary activities.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
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...attracts the attention of the community.While some people suppose that their particip...
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...se that their participation may downplay the significance of problems, I would ar...
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...t as a way to enhance their reputations.In an effort to attract the attention of s...
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...particular passion or interest in those.Furthermore, the association with celebrities may ...
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... those.Furthermore, the association with celebrities may trivialize the serious w...
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...public image of the celebrity concerned.Consequently, we sometimes have to question their mo...
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...meaningful changes to social activities.Firstly, they have a huge number of fans who ar...
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... fans who are inspired by their actions.For example, when My Tam- a Vietnamese lege...
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...privileged children in mountainous areas,thousands of youngsters from her fan clubs joined...
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... volunteers thanks to her encouragement.Secondly, celebrities are often trusted by both ...
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...aising the profile of aid organizations.As a result , more people learn about proj...
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...profile of aid organizations.As a result , more people learn about projects and do...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, second, secondly, so, well, while, for example, in conclusion, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 10.4138276553 77% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 7.30460921844 137% => OK
Pronoun: 27.0 24.0651302605 112% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 41.998997996 114% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.3376753507 144% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1680.0 1615.20841683 104% => OK
No of words: 297.0 315.596192385 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.65656565657 5.12529762239 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15134772569 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.83762322839 2.80592935109 137% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 176.041082164 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.592592592593 0.561755894193 105% => OK
syllable_count: 526.5 506.74238477 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.10420841683 190% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 5.0 16.0721442886 31% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 59.0 20.2975951904 291% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 251.316533479 49.4020404114 509% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 336.0 106.682146367 315% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 59.4 20.7667163134 286% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 29.0 7.06120827912 411% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.01903807615 239% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.67935871743 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.9879759519 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.227721184553 0.244688304435 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.132930454598 0.084324248473 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0389742105065 0.0667982634062 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.136503937818 0.151304729494 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0496490106235 0.056905535591 87% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 34.9 13.0946893788 267% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -5.33 50.2224549098 -11% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 18.2 7.44779559118 244% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 28.7 11.3001002004 254% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 16.44 12.4159519038 132% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 11.19 8.58950901804 130% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 78.4519038076 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 9.78957915832 194% => OK
gunning_fog: 25.6 10.1190380762 253% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 19.0 10.7795591182 176% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.