Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The social media is essential to our progress and well-being in the contemporary era. Technology is a service that is especially vital to the prosperity of athletes and famous entertainers. Therefore, I disagree that famous people deserve to have more privacy than they have now because of the widespread of the social media and the high competition between famous people today.
First, the social media is the single greatest determinants of the famous person’s success in the contemporary era. In fact, the people today depend on the social media to encourage their models. Additionally, people toady consider the social media is a key factor which enable them to know everything about the famous entertainers which they support. For instance, the famous person can utilize the social media to become well known by talking about their daily life in the social media like facebook and snapchat in order to encourage more people to follow them. In contrast, the famous will loss his celebrity if he avoids talking about his private life. Thus, the famous person can increase his followers by posting many details in his social media accounts talking about themselves in different ways.
Another reason why I advocate that entertainments and famous people must have limited privacy is the high competition between them. It is a well-established fact that each story that the famous person talks about his intention or his past will act as an advertisement and reminder for the public which enable him to overcome any rumor or obstacle against his celebrity. Consequently, that increase his fame and make the people eager to check his accounts frequently just to become the first whom know about his plan. On the other hand, avoiding the public has bad impacts on his fame and gives the chance for competitors to take his place by attracting his lovers and talking about him in a bad way without worrying from declaring untrusted news regarding him to the public to disrupt him from reaching to his goal.
To sum up, the famous must show their daily life to the public to be closer to their followers. Hopefully, more entremets and athletes will recognize that.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 687, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER
Message: Consider replacing "in a bad way" with adverb for "bad"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...acting his lovers and talking about him in a bad way without worrying from declaring untrust...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, first, if, regarding, so, therefore, thus, well, for instance, in contrast, in fact, talking about, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1816.0 1977.66487455 92% => OK
No of words: 360.0 407.700716846 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04444444444 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35587717469 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69463916822 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494444444444 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 569.7 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 7.0 3.08781362007 227% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.0363091448 48.9658058833 131% => OK
Chars per sentence: 121.066666667 100.406767564 121% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.46666666667 5.45110844103 174% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146080856993 0.236089414692 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0626794556192 0.076458572812 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0820851888292 0.0737576698707 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.112157045166 0.150856017488 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0838425106313 0.0645574589148 130% => OK
automated_readability_index: 14.3 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.25 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 86.8835125448 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.