Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
All over the world, famous people has a special role in people`s life. Throughout the ages there has been an overwhelming weight of obsession on people`s mind regarding behaving of famous people. Although it is a little hard to reach a consensus on this issue, I am, to a great extent on the belief that, famous entertainers and athletes should have rights like other people and have their privacy more than now. In what follows, I will delve some conspicuous aspects which persuade me to put forward this perspective.
To commence, the first point I would like to make is that, they can`t do anything they want in public places, they can`t behave in their own way. Let me illiustrate that in other word. I whatched a video about cristiano ranaldo, one of the famous soccer player. In this video, showed that he went to the coffeshop and to drank a coffe. When he sited down and started to drink, sudenly, one woman went on his table and appealed to take a picture with him, after that, another people went there to do the same thing, eventually, he couldn`t drink his coffe and left the corffeshop. Based on what I mentioned, each of famous entertainers and athletes can`t live like other people because their situation in the society.
The second reason coming to my mind to substantiate and indicate my stand point concerning this issue is that, they recieve a lot of attention from people and usually, this attention bothers them and doesn`t let them to live normaly and comfortable. My cousin`s situation is a compelling example of what I mean. He is a member of the most popular socer team in my country. He is a funny man and when he come to our home he makes all of us happy and we laugh all the time because of him; however, when he goes to the public places and faces with other unfamiliar people, he has to behave in other way, because of enermous attention is on him. In addition, famous people always become judgment.
Drawing upon the reasons, although there are some exception which are excluded from the general rule, I do agree that famous entertainers and atheletes deserve more privacy. To recapitulate the reasons, not only famous people can`t live comfortable in public places and when they face with other people, but, they can`t behave in their own way, also they become judgment.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 611, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
...and left the corffeshop. Based on what I mentioned, each of famous entertainers a...
Line 5, column 449, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
...n he come to our home he makes all of us happy and we laugh all the time because ...
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, regarding, second, so, as to, i mean, in addition, to a great extent
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1954.0 1977.66487455 99% => OK
No of words: 406.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81280788177 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48881294772 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69427619602 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509852216749 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 610.2 618.680645161 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 75.6563895078 48.9658058833 155% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.941176471 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8823529412 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.82352941176 5.45110844103 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.16215455136 0.236089414692 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0518495053407 0.076458572812 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0623110485815 0.0737576698707 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.111359869254 0.150856017488 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0505983191401 0.0645574589148 78% => OK
automated_readability_index: 13.2 11.7677419355 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.91 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.89 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 86.8835125448 92% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.