Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
It is important to know about events happening around the world, even if it is unlikely that they will affect your daily life.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The world is large and there are billions of people around the world. Some poeple say that it is important to know about the happening around the world, even if it is unlikely that they will affect our life because it will make us update to the world and also, make us knowledgeable. However, I strongly disagree with this poeple and with the statement, and I believe that I do not need to know the events happening around the world, which are not related with my life. I beleive in this way for two reasons.
First of all, in this world thousands of events are happening just in a second. One cannot know about the each and every events. Although our brain has unlimited capability to store information, but continuous flow of information will create pressure on the brain, which is harmful for us. For example, In my country to get a job in the civil service, one need to have a vast knowledge regarding the country and the world. After my graduation, I started to prepare for the exam. I read a lot about the history and current affairs of the world. These huge information make my brain less efficient and I was over pressurised, eventually I gor depressed with my life. Then I realized that knowing about these is totally useless for me, and I should stop it. Then, I had focused in my area of interest and I started to know only the thing, which are important to my life. Knowing everything around the world is not possible for a man. It will pressurised the brain of a man and can affect the life negatively. Thus one do not need to know about the events happening around the world, and one should focus on that events, which are related to his or her life.
Second of all, focusing the events, which are important to us, make us more efficient and productive. If a person want to know about everything, then he cannot focus on his field properly because some unessential events will start to bother him or her. I remember when I was in my undergradute thesis research I was intended to know about the international politics and local politics, which ultimately made my research unsuccessful. Later, in my M.Sc. research, I just focused on my research work and avoid to gathere outside information, as a result, I got maximum grade point on the research. The example shows us that a deep focus on the related field make us successful and more productive. Hence, one do not need to bother about the all the events happening around the world, and to be an effective and productive person, one should need to know about the events, which are important and related to his or her life.
In coclusions, it is true that knowing about events those are happening around the world will make one wise and update, but it is clear that knowing the news, which is not related to my life, is superfluous. Therefore, I believe that I need to know only the events happening around the world, which are important and can affect my life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 940, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'pressurise'
Suggestion: pressurise
...orld is not possible for a man. It will pressurised the brain of a man and can affect the l...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1007, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...man and can affect the life negatively. Thus one do not need to know about the event...
^^^^
Line 5, column 450, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Sc
...y research unsuccessful. Later, in my M.Sc. research, I just focused on my researc...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, regarding, second, so, then, therefore, thus, for example, as a result, first of all, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 15.1003584229 152% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 9.8082437276 194% => OK
Conjunction : 26.0 13.8261648746 188% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 73.0 43.0788530466 169% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2406.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 529.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.54820415879 4.8611393121 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79583152331 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.56628772145 2.67179642975 96% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.396975425331 0.524837075471 76% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 768.6 618.680645161 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 6.0 1.86738351254 321% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.422712145 48.9658058833 111% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.25 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0416666667 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.58333333333 5.45110844103 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.287627295844 0.236089414692 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0983403212979 0.076458572812 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.085406177971 0.0737576698707 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.234681355413 0.150856017488 156% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0881620165413 0.0645574589148 137% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 11.7677419355 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.11 10.9000537634 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.29 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 86.8835125448 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.