The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the argument, the vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries concluded that by installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, the company can prevent empoyees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic, and improve their overall profits. However, the author supports his conclusion with three unfounded assumptions, if refute, will dramatically undermine the persuasiveness of the argument.
Firstly, the vice presidents presumes that employees of the company use Internet only for the personal and entertaining activities. However, the case may not be true. In this present days there many official works, which are online based, so it is possible that the employees are using Internet for the office purposes. For example, the product of the Industry can be sold in online market and it is likely that maximum of the buyers are online, so the selling and marketing departments need to deal with internet.It is also possible that employees often need to check their emails, which are very much important to them, and for checking emails, employees need to use Internet. If any of the cases is true, then the prohibition in using internet will hamper the employees to operate their regular official works. Therefore, the recommendation of the vice president will not be valid one for the improvement of the company.
Secondly, the author assumes that the software to monitor the Internet use by employees is available, but this may not be necessarily true. It is possible that ther is no software, which can monitor the internet use. It is also possible that if there is any software to detect Internet use, cannot detect the user using it for the official works or for the personal works. If the case is true, then the author conclusion will not hold the water.
Finally, the writer claims that company computers are the only device to use internet and using internet is the only way to waste time in the office. However, this may not be the case. It is possible that maximum of the employees have their own smartphone, so they can easily use internet in the office without being noticed. It is also possible that the employees do not waste much time on internet, rather they waste more time by gossiping or many of the employees waste time by sleeping in the office. If any of the cases is true, then the argument will not be overly persuasive.
In conclusion, reduction of internet use in th office hour may help the company to make the intended results; however, as it stands now, the recommendation of the vice president relies on three unwarranted assumptions and make the arugument specious and untenable. Therefore, the author should provide additional information regarding the assumptions to make the recommendation reasonable and valid.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 464 350
No. of Characters: 2276 1500
No. of Different Words: 181 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.641 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.905 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.672 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 55 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.421 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.196 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.895 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.366 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 146, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (Internet) must be used with a third-person verb: 'uses'.
Suggestion: uses
...g software to detect employees Internet use on company computers, the company can p...
^^^
Line 3, column 515, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: It
... departments need to deal with internet.It is also possible that employees often n...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2347.0 2260.96107784 104% => OK
No of words: 463.0 441.139720559 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06911447084 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76805936413 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.421166306695 0.468620217663 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 749.7 705.55239521 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 79.9891266849 57.8364921388 138% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.526315789 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.3684210526 23.324526521 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.84210526316 5.70786347227 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.307109591209 0.218282227539 141% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0995478854958 0.0743258471296 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0879491515959 0.0701772020484 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.181840601663 0.128457276422 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0645875993384 0.0628817314937 103% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.34 8.32208582834 100% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 98.500998004 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.