Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A job with more vacation time but a low salary is better than a job with a high salary but less vacation time. Use specific reasons to support your answer.
These days, excursion becomes a famous activity for the majority of people in the world. Some people choose occupation with extensive vacation time, even though it provides a meager income. While other people prefer working a job with high compensation but less vacation time. As far as I am concerned, I disagree with such a notion. I believe that a career with high revenue is better, and I will explore further in the subsequent paragraphs.
First and foremost, working a profession with high revenue allows people to live a lavish lifestyle. These days, individuals have to spend more money on necessities, such as houses and food, than those in the past. Moreover, going to an excursion is costly, so individuals should work to acquire high compensation in order to afford an exclusive vacation trip. I can attest to this from my own experience. My parents are doctors working for state hospitals, so their work is lucrative but also excessively busy. They spent an enormous amount of money on their endeavors on our last annual trip to Japan. We booked a room in Shibuya, a luxury district in Tokyo, and ate a high-quality buffet. Furthermore, my mother went shopping for many clothes and perfumes. Although we do not have much time to travel frequently, every vacation trip we have was extravagant.
Secondly, another perspective that supports my standpoint is that money from a job with high revenue helps people in unexpected situations. Unfortunately, humans are inevitably subjected to unpredictable ailments and accidents. Therefore, individuals should pay close attention to their financial stability, and they should have enough reserved currency to pay medication fees from those unexpected scenarios. For instance, according to the research from Chulalongkorn University in Bangkok, a plethora of employees in Bangkok tend to spend their money on their vacation rather than save it for any emergency cases. As a result, sixty percent of Bangkok's workers have low financial stability. Furthermore, due to many banking promotions, many Bangkokians now found themselves deep in debt from an excessive shopping spree. If they had worked a job with less vacation time but high income instead, their life would have been more stable and had more reserved money.
In conclusion, I firmly maintain the belief that working in a high-income profession is better. This is due to the fact that a high salary allows people to have a more comfortable life, and people need money to prepare for urgent situations.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 844, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'been'.
Suggestion: been
...frequently, every vacation trip we have was extravagant. Secondly, another perspec...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for instance, in conclusion, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 37.0 43.0788530466 86% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2112.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 408.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.17647058824 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49433085973 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91630002639 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 226.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.553921568627 0.524837075471 106% => OK
syllable_count: 666.9 618.680645161 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 37.2546542429 48.9658058833 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.8260869565 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.7391304348 20.6045352989 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.82608695652 5.45110844103 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.88709677419 225% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262529688029 0.236089414692 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0742944653543 0.076458572812 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0874639706468 0.0737576698707 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.169799147703 0.150856017488 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0889647868306 0.0645574589148 138% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 11.7677419355 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 58.1214874552 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 10.1575268817 97% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.47 10.9000537634 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.93 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 86.8835125448 132% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.