Nowadays our environment are full of screens such as televisions, computers and tablets. It is almost impossible to stay away from them unless you live in an urban area. These screens are needed new movies in a variety of topics to play every day to attract people. Many people believe that televisions have a negative effect on teenagers while others do not . In my perspective, televisions have more positive effects then negative on the way that young people behave for two important reasons.
First of all, televisions are a full of information. There are a great deal of programs such as documentaries which give you a chance to learn new things. These kind of programs explains how variety of information can be used as a life savings detail. For example, one of my cousins likes to watch a science channel which presents small science experiments for kitchen. One day, her mother was so sad to break one of hers valuable dishes which she presents her delicious dishes every thanksgiving. The mother was almost crying when she offers to try an experiment which she learned from this channel. She boiled a liter of milk and put the broken dish inside to milk and waited for five minutes. Guess what? She saved the dish. Her mother cried again but this time from happiness. As you can see, a small information can help you to make your loved ones happy.
Second, televisions can encourage teenagers to have a career. It sounds impossible to believe, how can a tv screen can encourage someone having a career. Let me tell you my sister's story. She is older than me and for her high school times I remember her watching the TV series called Grey's Anatomy all the time. This series is affected her in a positive way to become a medical doctor. She had no idea about medicine before it, but after watching all the episodes, she was really sure what she become. After years of studying, she is a pediatrician now. Also, she became my idol and I decided to study medicine with her unbelievable support. That's why televisions can be a guide to young people.
In conclusion, televisions can be useful to young people not only to get more information and also to have a idea about their future. Using a machine in a meaningful way is our choice, so having a positive effect from a television depends on us.
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- Integrated writing - TPO 51 3
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 359, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... effect on teenagers while others do not . In my perspective, televisions have mor...
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Line 1, column 420, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
... televisions have more positive effects then negative on the way that young people b...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...le behave for two important reasons. First of all, televisions are a full of ...
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Line 3, column 77, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'deals'?
Suggestion: deals
... full of information. There are a great deal of programs such as documentaries which...
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Line 3, column 161, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this kind' or 'These kinds'?
Suggestion: This kind; These kinds
... give you a chance to learn new things. These kind of programs explains how variety of inf...
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Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...p you to make your loved ones happy. Second, televisions can encourage teenag...
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Line 5, column 143, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'someone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'has'.
Suggestion: has
...w can a tv screen can encourage someone having a career. Let me tell you my sisters st...
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Line 5, column 346, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a positive way" with adverb for "positive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...l the time. This series is affected her in a positive way to become a medical doctor. She had no ...
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Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: That's
...medicine with her unbelievable support. Thats why televisions can be a guide to young...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ions can be a guide to young people. In conclusion, televisions can be useful...
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Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...o get more information and also to have a idea about their future. Using a machin...
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Line 7, column 156, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a meaningful way" with adverb for "meaningful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...dea about their future. Using a machine in a meaningful way is our choice, so having a positive eff...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, really, second, so, then, while, for example, in conclusion, kind of, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1903.0 1977.66487455 96% => OK
No of words: 407.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 4.67567567568 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49157444576 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62369752202 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 225.0 212.727598566 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.552825552826 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 612.9 618.680645161 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 32.855129487 48.9658058833 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 73.1923076923 100.406767564 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.6538461538 20.6045352989 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.34615384615 5.45110844103 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.5376344086 217% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.88709677419 184% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202566535002 0.236089414692 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.056031151976 0.076458572812 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0796419778885 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162563857709 0.150856017488 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.102074339657 0.0645574589148 158% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.4 11.7677419355 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.57 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.52 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.