Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Financial responsibility is a vital characteristic to manage each person's life in this progressive world where we live. People work hard to gain money for overcome their requirements, and without good sense of financial responsibility they couldn't afford their needs. Some people believe that young age is proper time to learn children about money management to train financially responsible adults for future, however, others hold an opposite opinion. In my view, children learning to handle money in young age will grow a financially responsible adult for two remarkable reasons.
First, children could gain a lot of experience by learning how to manage their own money. If people initiate to manage their own money at young age, they will confront with several barriers. So, they will absorb useful experience and become thoroughly financially responsible in their adulthood. For example, when I was kid, I asked my parents to buy me a bike, but they learned me if I want to buy something, I should save my pocket money that was allocated to me every month. At first, it was really arduous to manage my money because I always depleted it and had to lend some from my friends. Although these obstacles, each time, I learn a valuable experience which ultimately led to handle myself successfully and save enough money for buying bike. When I went to university, I should afford all of my requirements by revenue that university granted to me. Since, I learn to handle my money from childhood, I was well experienced and financially responsible in adulthood. This experience taught me that learning to manage money in childhood converts kids to a financially responsible adult in future.
Second, children who were taught to manage money in young age would make a better decision. In other words, all the time people are tempted to spend their money and are in the dilemma for shopping or not. If people could make a good decision, they will handle their money and become financially responsible. For instance, statistics demonstrated that adults with background in managing their money in childhood could make a better decision in financial hesitation. These researchers investigated two groups of adults, one who had handling money history in young age and another without any background in this field, in order to determine which group make better decision in financial situations. Scientists didn't expect a considerable difference between two groups at first. Surprisingly, in spite of expectation, results represented adults who learn to manage their own money in childhood could make a better decision in deal with financial complication than their counterparts. Not just including in financial management accomplished children in making fast decision, but also help them to opt the best one. If people hadn't learned to handle their money in childhood, they would not be financially responsible in adulthood.
In conclusion, though some people disagree with me, in my opinion, learning money management at young age led to a financially responsible adult. Not only could children gain useful experiences, but they also make better decisions. I think parents should allow children to handle their own money to train a financially responsible adult for future.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 67, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...s a vital characteristic to manage each persons life in this progressive world where we...
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Line 1, column 241, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: couldn't
... sense of financial responsibility they couldnt afford their needs. Some people believe...
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Line 3, column 1095, Rule ID: IN_PAST[1]
Message: Did you mean: 'in the future'?
Suggestion: in the future
...kids to a financially responsible adult in future. Second, children who were taught to ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 708, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...ion in financial situations. Scientists didnt expect a considerable difference betwee...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 1121, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: hadn't
...elp them to opt the best one. If people hadnt learned to handle their money in childh...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, really, second, so, well, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, in my opinion, in my view, in other words, in spite of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 74.0 52.1666666667 142% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2752.0 1977.66487455 139% => OK
No of words: 525.0 407.700716846 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.2419047619 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78673985869 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96651363971 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 212.727598566 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.44 0.524837075471 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 852.3 618.680645161 138% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.6003584229 121% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.4017325802 48.9658058833 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.08 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.0 20.6045352989 102% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.48 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.345107507245 0.236089414692 146% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.126521671845 0.076458572812 165% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0659529551158 0.0737576698707 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.262755377064 0.150856017488 174% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0335355164476 0.0645574589148 52% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 11.7677419355 117% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.11 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.29 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 10.002688172 120% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.