Do you agree or disagree with the following statement In order to become financially responsible adults children should learn to manage their own money at young age

It is critically important to raise our children properly. No one can deny that childhood is the best time to introduce our kids to what is good value and what is not. Personally, I agree with the statement that children should learn to control their own money to become financially competent in their future. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the subsequent paragraphs.
To begin with, children should learn that money does not grow on trees and they should work hard to get it. If children learn this concept, they will be more ready to their future. They will study hard and go the extra mile to achieve their dreams. I can not deny that my opinion is profoundly influenced by my personal experience. When I was young, my mother used to teach me and my sister about how my father worked hard to get us the money, we need to pay the rent and other bills. She always told us that we have to appreciate his efforts and we also have roles to do in our home. She motivated us to work hard in school in order to get better job that can pay us well and we can live comfortably. As a result, I decided to be a pharmacist and now I am a retail pharmacist in CVS and getting around 100,000 $ yearly and I work very hard to get the money and spend it properly.
Furthermore, when children learn the value of money, they will not waste it on trivial stuff. In other words, they will learn how to save and spend it wisely. For instance, I remember when I was 10, I used to make my bed every day for 1$ and I saved it in my piggy bank. At the end of the year, after saving good amount, I can buy my favorite toy. I remember I saved two years to get video game, which was a dream for me. Thus, Now I am financially responsible and I enjoy a very good credit score that allows me to apply for any loans easily. If I had not learnt how to manage my own money early, I would not have been financially independent.
In light of the above mentioned reasons, I strongly believe that learning in childhood the value of money and it is not easy to get it, will help them to be financially responsible. I advise all parents to start to teach their kids how to save and spent their money in an appropriate way.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
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It is critically important to raise our ...
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... raise our children properly. No one can deny that childhood is the best time to ...
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...explore in the subsequent paragraphs. To begin with, children should learn tha...
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...her used to teach me and my sister about how my father worked hard to get us the ...
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...ve to appreciate his efforts and we also have roles to do in our home. She motiva...
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Line 2, column 817, Rule ID: CURRENCY[2]
Message: The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: '$000'.
Suggestion: $000
...harmacist in CVS and getting around 100,000 $ yearly and I work very hard to get the ...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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... get the money and spend it properly. Furthermore, when children learn the val...
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Suggestion: $1
...10, I used to make my bed every day for 1$ and I saved it in my piggy bank. At the...
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..., after saving good amount, I can buy my favorite toy. I remember I saved two yea...
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...ot have been financially independent. In light of the above mentioned reasons,...
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Line 4, column 272, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
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... kids how to save and spent their money in an appropriate way.
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...nt their money in an appropriate way.
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, if, so, thus, well, for instance, i feel, as a result, in other words, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 77.0 43.0788530466 179% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1795.0 1977.66487455 91% => OK
No of words: 428.0 407.700716846 105% => OK
Chars per words: 4.19392523364 4.8611393121 86% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.548423998 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.3955582917 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 207.0 212.727598566 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.483644859813 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 558.0 618.680645161 90% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.51630824373 86% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 20.0 9.59856630824 208% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.0720192288 48.9658058833 70% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.4761904762 100.406767564 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.380952381 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.90476190476 5.45110844103 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.5376344086 217% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.225699859903 0.236089414692 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0703083318155 0.076458572812 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0979852291516 0.0737576698707 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.143893880508 0.150856017488 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0509049951302 0.0645574589148 79% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.5 11.7677419355 72% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 76.56 58.1214874552 132% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 7.02 10.9000537634 64% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.69 8.01818996416 83% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 86.8835125448 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.