Do you agree or disagree with the following statement People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment doing things they like to do rather than doing things they should do Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Nowadays a growing number of people focus on the problem of time management. It triggered hot debate on the Internet. Some people claim that people spend too much time on their personal enjoyments nowadays. While others counter that people still manage their time well. As for me, I agree with the statement that people spend too much time on their personal interest.

My first reason is that nowadays the ways of entertainments increased. In the past, people only got amusements from TV or novels, which wouldn\'t consume too much time. Nowadays, however, besides the above entertainments, there are more recreational ways like computer games, comics, video websites and so on. In this sense, people can indulge themselves in an amuse world easily. I still remember when I was a child, I don\'t have much things to enjoy. So I will just finish the tasks in school as quickly as I can and then preview the following class. Nowadays, there are way too much entertainments. Sometimes, I even not touch the task for whole days and immersed in the digital world. Therefore, it is clear that people spend too much time on entertainments.

My second reason is based on the fact that with modern technology, people could finish their jobs more quickly. Under the help of computers, many heavy work like counting, computing, and deducting can be finished by machines. Also, thanks to mobile phones, people could communicate with workmates effectively in return of shorter work time. At last, advanced management science could ensure a team to cooperate well to finish difficult tasks. In this sense, same task could be finished more effectively and accurately. Hence, people don\'t have to spend too much time on those must-do things. These spare times are often used for personal enjoyments.

At last, international economics have changed significantly, which also contribute to less tasks. Nowadays, those heavy jobs for production are shift to developing countries. For those developed countries, they just need to handle the world of finance to make sure it is working appropriately. Though these management jobs are also time consuming, comparing to the productional jobs, they are just a piece of cake. In those old days, developed countries--more accurately, their predecessors--are building huge factories for productional works. Workers spent most of their time working. Hence , as far as modern economics is concerned, people could spend more time on recreation.

From above, a conclusion is drawn that as far as advanced technology and modern economics is concerned, people spend more time on enjoyments rather than jobs. There is no denying that society today put more pressure on citizens. However, just because there is too much street, there is more reason for people to play. I believe, in the future, more and more people will find a balance between work and play.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 208, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... on their personal enjoyments nowadays. While others counter that people still manage...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 358, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...sense, people can indulge themselves in an amuse world easily. I still remember when I w...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 431, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...member when I was a child, I don\t have much things to enjoy. So I will just finish ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 581, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...wing class. Nowadays, there are way too much entertainments. Sometimes, I even not t...
^^^^
Line 7, column 87, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun tasks is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...significantly, which also contribute to less tasks. Nowadays, those heavy jobs for p...
^^^^
Line 7, column 592, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... spent most of their time working. Hence , as far as modern economics is concerned...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, hence, however, if, second, so, still, then, therefore, well, while, as for

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 43.0788530466 91% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2414.0 1977.66487455 122% => OK
No of words: 468.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15811965812 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65116196802 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82956168333 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.517094017094 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 747.0 618.680645161 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 9.59856630824 146% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 10.0 4.94265232975 202% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.6003584229 155% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 27.0818889839 48.9658058833 55% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 75.4375 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.625 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.1875 5.45110844103 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.228977558363 0.236089414692 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0578769876475 0.076458572812 76% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0628701681405 0.0737576698707 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.122486074759 0.150856017488 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0432391279737 0.0645574589148 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 11.7677419355 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 10.1575268817 87% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.06 10.9000537634 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.84 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 86.8835125448 120% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.