Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Television advertising directed toward young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In today's increasingly competitive market advertisement plays a pivotal role. There are numerous companies producing toys or other products related to young children, some of which decide to use television advertisement to reach their target customers. I, personally, disagree that this method is acceptable and I will elaborate on my view point through the following paragraphs.
First, children aged two to five do not have the ability to appropriately decide and buy anything; so their parents should decide whether a product is suitable for them or not. But when children watch the advertisements they would be captivated and thus insist on buying that. In other words, since it is far more easier to convince children that they need a product rather than convincing their parent, companies use this method to improve their sales amount. As a tangible example, my two-year old son watches intriguing toy car advertisements on television every day and he always asks me to purchase it, nevertheless he has a dozen of identical toys and his room is almost full of them. Yet I have to buy something similar because of his intolerable insisting.
Second, these kind of advertisements are not true most of the time. commercial companies try to glorify use of their products. They magnitude the product's advantages and disregard its shortcomings, which is vivid to us as adults but not to children. As a result, children totally believe what they see and get mesmerized by it. I can recall once my son watched an advertisement revolving around a doll, which was supposed to be a great friend, who could talk and laugh with children. Me and my son ordered the doll with a lot of passion. However, it turned out that the doll is just an ordinary toy just like the other toys we have bought before.
In conclusion, I firmly refute the statement that children-related advertisements should be allowed on televisions. This is because children cannot decide and buy anything, and because these advertisements are mostly untrue.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 381, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...point through the following paragraphs. First, children aged two to five do not ...
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Line 5, column 310, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'easier' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: easier
...g that. In other words, since it is far more easier to convince children that they need a p...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 766, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r because of his intolerable insisting. Second, these kind of advertisements are...
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Line 9, column 9, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this kind' or 'these kinds'?
Suggestion: this kind; these kinds
...s intolerable insisting. Second, these kind of advertisements are not true most of ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 69, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Commercial
...isements are not true most of the time. commercial companies try to glorify use of their p...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 648, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e the other toys we have bought before. In conclusion, I firmly refute the state...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, nevertheless, second, so, thus, in conclusion, kind of, as a result, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1701.0 1977.66487455 86% => OK
No of words: 334.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.09281437126 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27500489853 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03891625615 2.67179642975 114% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 212.727598566 95% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.607784431138 0.524837075471 116% => OK
syllable_count: 529.2 618.680645161 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.0353308118 48.9658058833 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.058823529 100.406767564 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.6470588235 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.35294117647 5.45110844103 117% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.202127124285 0.236089414692 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.061573940875 0.076458572812 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0471224873717 0.0737576698707 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.129207140122 0.150856017488 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0225446821146 0.0645574589148 35% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.31 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 79.0 86.8835125448 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 10.002688172 125% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.