It is universally acknowledged that choosing a job or future career, which drastically affect people's well-being, is one of the most important decisions people would make in their life. Therefore, some people suggest that adolescents who are facing this decision to attempt different jobs before making a long term decision. However, I disagree with this opinion, and I would delve into the reasons behind this standpoint.
To commence with, it is unfeasible for teenagers to attempt some of the jobs before acquiring the essential skills, especially careers that require a thorough understanding of knowledge. For instance, a scientist needs to spend a long period learning the basic knowledge before conducting a research. For adolescents who are interested in this career path, it is unfeasible for them to attempt to be a scientist in a short term when considering the skills they needed. While there are some careers that require less skills which teenager could experience them before making the decision, most of the teenagers' dream careers such as artists, writer, and engineer require some foundamental knowledge that could not be learnt in a short term. Therefore, it is unfeasible for teenagers to attempt a job for short period.
Secondly, a more feasible alternative, which is currently adopted by many of the schools, is to invite alumni of different field to share their career experience. By listening to their senior's experience, students could have a glimpse on different career life and obtain the essential information before making the decision. Some critics may claims that information gain by learning others' experience is not as much as by having hands-on experience, yet this opinion is specious. As mention above, teenagers do not have the essential skills to participate the core part of a job. For instance, teenagers could only be assistants or even spectators in a laboratory if they want to attempt to be a scientist. These experience give little information to teenagers as they could not even understand the investigation topic. Instead, having a scientist to reveal what research life is like to adolescents give more useful information as it does not require esoteric scientific knowledge. As a result, they could make a wiser decision on their career.
Judging from the above evidence, we could safely arrive the conclusion that attempting different jobs is not a good method to decide one's career in terms of feasibility and the existent of a better alternative.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 61, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
... is unfeasible for teenagers to attempt some of the jobs before acquiring the essential ski...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 289, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...g the basic knowledge before conducting a research. For adolescents who are interested in ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 511, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun skills is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...ile there are some careers that require less skills which teenager could experience ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 134, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...ent jobs is not a good method to decide ones career in terms of feasibility and the ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, while, for instance, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 43.0788530466 72% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2102.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 401.0 407.700716846 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.24189526185 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.47492842339 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96208338387 2.67179642975 111% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.488778054863 0.524837075471 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 661.5 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.3574077183 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.647058824 100.406767564 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5882352941 20.6045352989 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.76470588235 5.45110844103 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.200607661283 0.236089414692 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0716996744479 0.076458572812 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0459981227604 0.0737576698707 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.133221170164 0.150856017488 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0394588361334 0.0645574589148 61% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.41 10.9000537634 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 86.8835125448 110% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.