Do you agree or disagree with he following statement? Some parents offer money to their school-age children for each high grades they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
I strongly agree with that idea, because I think it will be beneficial for school-age children if their parents offer them money for each high-grade they get in school. I hold this opinion because of several reasons. First, offering money to young children by their parents triggers motive and encouragement for children to increase their efforts due to gain higher grades. Second, children probably learn that if they study hard and follow their target efficiently, they will obtain good consequences, which helps them in their future career.
According to my point of view, when parents offer money to their school-age children for their each high mark they get in school, they encourage their children indirectly, which leads to better results for children's educational career. In other words, parents fortify their children's stimulus in order to try harder and do their assignment more precise than before, because they expect reward from their parents. In contrast, if parents do not care about their children's grades, children definitely will be discouraged because they understand that there is no difference between a high-grade and low-grade. Also, they notice that it does not necessary for them to try hard to get solid marks in their school, because their parents do not pay attention to their education. Even being reluctant and absent-minded during their classes can be another negative impact of their parents carelessness.
Moreover, children will learn that if they do their best in their school, their struggle will not be fruitless. Parents teach their children an influential lesson by offering money to them when they gain a good mark in their school, which is stimulate them to pursue their goals to achieve success. For instance, when I was 9 years old, my parents promised me that if I got a good grades in my final exams they would buy a bicycle for me. This triggered me a serious impetus to try harder than before and do my practice and assignment regularly to attain to my bicycle. When I brought my final exams results to my parents, they saw that I did well in my school and they bought a bicycle for me.
In general, it does not matter than parents offer money to their children or give them their favorite reward, what is important is they should encourage them to get high grades in their school to secure their future career.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 242, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'stimulated'.
Suggestion: stimulated
...n a good mark in their school, which is stimulate them to pursue their goals to achieve s...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, moreover, second, so, well, for instance, i think, in contrast, in general, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 79.0 43.0788530466 183% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 45.0 52.1666666667 86% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1966.0 1977.66487455 99% => OK
No of words: 397.0 407.700716846 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95214105793 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.54996700364 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.460957178841 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 571.5 618.680645161 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.1344086022 129% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 45.3840892335 48.9658058833 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.066666667 100.406767564 131% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.4666666667 20.6045352989 128% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.13333333333 5.45110844103 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.431905234624 0.236089414692 183% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.184176146407 0.076458572812 241% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.117547374611 0.0737576698707 159% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.313488996069 0.150856017488 208% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0740462177413 0.0645574589148 115% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 11.7677419355 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 62.01 58.1214874552 107% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.73 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 86.8835125448 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.0537634409 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 63.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.