A high school has 2 choices to fill the summer vacation of the students to fulfill their free time. They can designate some extra classes for students or ask them to prepare a presentation after their visit from some museums. Which one do you prefer?
In such a civilized society, in spite of several disagreements, people have in various areas so far as one’s view goes, one point that virtually everybody approves upon is the importance of education. This is owing to the fact that it plays an important role in the foundation of each society. With this in mind, a broad range of controversial attitudes might stimulate heated debate as to how can students pass their summer vacation. Two sides often form in this regard. Those who trust that attending to extra classes is better. While others think the presentation of a report related to visiting some museums is superior to another choice. I personally consider myself among the latter group. Among the many reasons one can give for this point, two conspicuous reasons will be elaborated through ensuing lines.
The first and prominent reason which comes to the mind is that presentation can give them a great opportunity to learn other extra skills. It goes without saying that students, especially in high school, just study to pass their credits and as a result, they are not able to speak in public which is a very important task of every student after entering to the university. Therefore, one of the most effective skills is to gain the ability of speech in public. It cannot be deniable that every person has a huge amount of stress in the first speech. So, by practicing these skills in high school, students will be able to become more confident and productive in their future studies. On the other hand, attending extra classes not only deprive them to achieve these kinds of skills but also is more tedious for all of them.
Another imperative reason which deserves some words here is that they become more familiar with the culture of the ancient people. Needless to say that museums are the main source of every country’s history and every person should know about its history to learn from the past and use for the construction of the future. According to a reputable research conducted at the Sharif University of Technology, it was found that the number of students who want study history in their higher educations has been increased significantly during the past years. So, visiting museums can provide a high-quality atmosphere for the students to pursue their interests.
In conclusion, there are numerous reasons which can be persuasive enough to corroborate my view. All in all, having analyzed the given reasons above, which are obtaining more skills and becoming familiar with the history and culture of antique societies, one can clearly conclude that students should visit museums instead of attending in extra classes. Thus, I highly recommend that high schools should provide some trips to visit and present their obtained information.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 537, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...t attending to extra classes is better. While others think the presentation of a repo...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 824, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t also is more tedious for all of them. Another imperative reason which deserves...
^^^
Line 4, column 472, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...and present their obtained information.
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, so, therefore, thus, while, as to, in conclusion, as a result, in spite of, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 43.0788530466 88% => OK
Preposition: 70.0 52.1666666667 134% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2321.0 1977.66487455 117% => OK
No of words: 462.0 407.700716846 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02380952381 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63618218583 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63960040573 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 212.727598566 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.547619047619 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 726.3 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 59.4548934381 48.9658058833 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.523809524 100.406767564 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.47619047619 5.45110844103 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309593219527 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0820666906995 0.076458572812 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0660185175037 0.0737576698707 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.188839997468 0.150856017488 125% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0316649623012 0.0645574589148 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.2 11.7677419355 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.35 8.01818996416 104% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 86.8835125448 122% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.