Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay topics:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.

Do you think this is a good idea?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

The advanced education has progressed during the past few years, resulting in an increase number of parents are putting emphasis on the education of their children from a younger age. Under such a circumstance, the question concerning the approach to lit up the motivation of their children has been raised. Whereas some people believe in the benefits of material incentive for the improvement of academic performance, I, however, hold the opposite view.

To begin with, it would eliminate the motivation for purely purse of knowledge as opposed to what many believe. The material rewards create an allure for children in trade of diligence and outstanding grades, hindering the exploration of the reason for learning. They are motivated for the rewards, not for the process of learning itself, not for their career options, not for their dreams. Many children would lose enthusiasm since they are not aware of the in-depth reason for education.

Furthermore, my rationale for the disapprovement based on the dependency on rewards that children would develop in the long run. The rewards would be taken for granted and expected whenever high grade is attained. However, considering the senario that parents try to stop the feeding of money when they are older or forgot to give the rewards for even one time, their children would develop a feeling of disappointment and anger, requiring for the money that they feel they deserve.

Lastly, as a consequence of the dependency mentioned above, children would display a remarkable decline in academic performance as the rewards stopped, which would cause frustration and stress meanwhile. Taken my friend in experimental school as an example, once she topped in our class in an integrated exam owing to the rewards her parents promise. Contrastly, what follows is the drop of nearly 20 places in the following exam in the absence of money rewards.

In brief, I advance that it is not reasonable to offer school-age money for high mark because of the disadvantages including decreased motivation, generation of dependency and recession without the rewards.

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Average: 7.6 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 13, column 391, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... Contrastly, what follows is the drop of nearly 20 places in the following exam i...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, lastly, so, thus, whereas, while, in brief, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 23.0 43.0788530466 53% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 8.0752688172 248% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1784.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 338.0 407.700716846 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.27810650888 4.8611393121 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.28774723029 4.48103885553 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87176777844 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.550295857988 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 553.5 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.3594639662 48.9658058833 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.428571429 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1428571429 20.6045352989 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.64285714286 5.45110844103 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.256599015872 0.236089414692 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0869840052769 0.076458572812 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0576493905115 0.0737576698707 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.145659653405 0.150856017488 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0552786329931 0.0645574589148 86% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 11.7677419355 132% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.64 10.9000537634 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.45 8.01818996416 118% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.