Some people like to keep a record of their own experiences by uploading pictures and other information to social-networking sites. Other people prefer not to create such records.Which approach do you prefer, and why?
People during the journey of life experience myriad situations which some of them are emotionally valuable, such as going to the trips, hanging out with best friends, marriage day, and so forth. Therefore, they take photos in order to records these moments forever. Some people think they should show and share these captured photos and other information in social media. Others hold an opposite view believing that it is not a good idea to share personal photos and information in the social-networking sites.
To begin with, in today's sophisticated world, since people experience different life conditions such as various financial situations, different family status, and etcetera, they are always comparing their lives with their friends. Individuals everyday post their pleasant memories in social media, which all are only about the quality time they have in their lives. However, they do not say anything about their problems and difficulties in such a medium. Therefore, when one is overwhelmed with a lot of tension in his life, seeing others' euphoria, get a sense of depression. He compared his hectic life with the appealing photos which his friends share in the social media. For instance, one of my friends did not get along very well with his husband in some particular matters. When she saw the photos of her friends which showed their romantic relationship, she was disappointed with her personal life because she was not aware of the problems and debates that those couples had behind the lovely pictures.
Furthermore, although the advent of technology has numerous merit for the human being, it has many disadvantages too. Nowadays, there are so many savvies in computer science who can abuse people’s photos and information. They easily hack accounts of ordinary users of social media and ask for money so as to exchange users’ pictures and information. In such a circumstance, people should make a rational decision about using social media, and if they want to use it, they should take its risk as well. An example can drive this notion home. A famous actress in my country shared her photos on her private page. Someone who has some problem with the actress hired a hacker and shared her pictures into the Internet. Since in my country, women should have hijab in order to be allowed to work, the actress lost her credit to work, and her barefaced photos in the social media wreaked havoc on her life.
In conclusion, with two mentioned reasons into account, I do believe that people should avoid posting their photos and information on social-networking websites. Sharing personal information in social media, not only do people compare their lives condition with each other, but they also are exposed to the threats of hackers and online criminals.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 300, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...users of social media and ask for money so as to exchange users’ pictures and informatio...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, so, therefore, well, as to, for instance, in conclusion, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 52.1666666667 123% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2330.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 457.0 407.700716846 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09846827133 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62358717085 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68173866159 2.67179642975 100% => OK
Unique words: 245.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.536105032823 0.524837075471 102% => OK
syllable_count: 724.5 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.1742541779 48.9658058833 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.952380952 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7619047619 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.52380952381 5.45110844103 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.215941563166 0.236089414692 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0697305347841 0.076458572812 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0554595722057 0.0737576698707 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.162763513088 0.150856017488 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0679181429553 0.0645574589148 105% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.3 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.69 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 86.8835125448 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.