Some people think that it's important to follow traditions even if they are different from individuals' interests. Others believe that individuals' preferences are more essential than traditions. Which view do you agree with and why ?
There is no doubt that human beings live as a social animal for such a long history, which it has produced many diverse communities and cultures. Each culture has a well-known traditions and rules which dynamically transfer to next generation. There is a heated debate that if we should stick to our traditions or we do not have to follow them strictly. In my opinion, we should not oblige us to follow our traditions tightly. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will elaborate on them in following essay.
First, many of these traditions do not have a logical reason behind them. Many of instructions and traditions are time-limited and they were practical and useful only for a specific time. If we want to follow them just because they have respected by our predecessors, without thinking and criticizing those traditions, we could not benefit and surely hurt our life. To put this in a more vivid picture, in our country, Iran, we have many unreasonable rules about marriage which destroy the relationship of boys and girls not only before the marriage bot after living together as well. Just as a few, boys should pay an enormous amount of money before marriage to his bride's family, that is not affordable for many of young adults. Then, if we have to follow these bad traditions, whole community will suffer in a long run.
Second, many of those traditions were belong to old time and with this high-pace revolutionary changes in the world they are a bottle-neck in the process of development of countries. Thanks to technological advancement, people from all cross of the world connect so easily and fast. Their cultural insight and traditions could not keep this pace and works as an obstacle when they want to communicate. To have an efficient and productive communication, people should consider a bigger perspective with an open mind about their and other people traditions. As an example, I remember when I moved to Boston, as a new comer, I found that there is a massive difference between my traditions and cultural insight with this new American culture. To adopt this new lifestyle, I have no choice but to omit many of my cultural traditions included foods, customs, and ideas, to accept and being accepted in this new culture. As we can see, many of traditions can hurt intercultural communication if we stick to them.
In sum, I strongly believe that we do not have to follow our traditions strictly. This is because many of those traditions are out of date and banned people to have a better life and because they are an important obstacle when people with different cultural backgrounds want to communicate with each other if we do not have an open mind.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...elaborate on them in following essay. First, many of these traditions do not h...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... community will suffer in a long run. Second, many of those traditions were be...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 46, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'belonged'.
Suggestion: belonged
... Second, many of those traditions were belong to old time and with this high-pace rev...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 619, Rule ID: NEW_COMER[1]
Message: Did you mean 'newcomer'?
Suggestion: newcomer
...I remember when I moved to Boston, as a new comer, I found that there is a massive differ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...al communication if we stick to them. In sum, I strongly believe that we do no...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 349, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...h other if we do not have an open mind.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, second, so, then, well, i feel, no doubt, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 21.0 13.8261648746 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 60.0 43.0788530466 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2228.0 1977.66487455 113% => OK
No of words: 464.0 407.700716846 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80172413793 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64119157421 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81178564716 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 212.727598566 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478448275862 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 713.7 618.680645161 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.2718609164 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.4 100.406767564 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.55 5.45110844103 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.206106379334 0.236089414692 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0734628772413 0.076458572812 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0437450545333 0.0737576698707 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14940694023 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0477439356637 0.0645574589148 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.01818996416 97% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.