Some young people are free in the evenings or have days off at school, which way can bring them the most benefit?
۱٫ To accumulate work experience by a part-time job or volunteering in a community
۲٫Learning to play a sport
۳٫ Learning to play a musical instrument
In my opinion, students should spend their free time to work in a part-time position or volunteer in a community. It’s because they can gain some hands-on experiences related to their study subjects and as a result, learn those subjects better. Moreover, unlike enrolling in a playing sport class or learning a musical instrument, voluntary or part-time work will not cost for them. I will illustrate my reasons in the following paragraphs.
First of all, working in a related job to your study field, either a part-time job or voluntary one, can help you to learn more things about your study field. For example, I remember when I was studying in an art school, I had a part-time job as a photographer for a photographic journal. I learned lots of things through my experience there. Indeed, I had a good opportunity to practice every theoretical thing that I was learned in my classes in my practical work. That opportunity provided me with a tangible understanding of every theoretical method; as a result, I could learn more than my classmates about every subject related to photography and consequently, I could gain high scores in those classes. I believe that any other thing couldn’t help me to learn my lessons efficiently as much as that experience do. For example, if I had spent my free time to learn a thing irrelevant to my study, such as a sport or playing a musical instrument, I would never have mastered in some subjects about my study field in that early stage.
For the second reason, students have to spend lots of money on learning how to play a sport or how to play a musical instrument. However, having a part-time job or volunteer in a community not only will not cost for them but also may make money for them. For instance, when I was working as a part-time photographer in the aforementioned journal, I had two other friends that one of them, Sarah, took guitar lessons and another one, Tina, volunteered in a local community to teach drawing to poor children. At the end of that year, when we were talking about our accomplishments in that year, we found out that I had earned $3000 by my part-time job, Tina hadn’t earned any money, and Sarah had spent $2000 to learn that musical instrument. Thus, learning a new thing, such as playing a sport or playing a musical instrument, will cost students a lot. By contrast, they don’t need to spend any money on a voluntary experience in a community to fill their free time. Additionally, they can make a considerable amount of money by working part-time in their free time.
Based on the aforementioned reasons, it can be concluded that hardly can any other suggestion bring about such benefits for students. Therefore, I suggest a part-time work or voluntary job in a community for every student who wants to benefit his free time.
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, however, if, may, moreover, second, so, therefore, thus, for example, for instance, such as, talking about, as a result, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 9.8082437276 153% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 61.0 43.0788530466 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2341.0 1977.66487455 118% => OK
No of words: 491.0 407.700716846 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.76782077393 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70728369723 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92599348205 2.67179642975 110% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 212.727598566 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435845213849 0.524837075471 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 729.0 618.680645161 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.778248391 48.9658058833 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.05 100.406767564 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.55 20.6045352989 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.0 5.45110844103 165% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.336326563564 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.119776887272 0.076458572812 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0569310808355 0.0737576698707 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.229717454055 0.150856017488 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0447051080811 0.0645574589148 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 11.7677419355 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 58.1214874552 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.68 10.9000537634 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.56 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.