TPO 13 - 2Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past.

Nowadays, we incline to consider that the family with a variety of generations is less important in my country. It is because most of us tend to see it a waste of time to be involved with older generations or other aunts and uncles. However, I don't believe that this thought is correct, and I would like to demonstrate those two reasons in my essay to prove my thinking; the extended family is an introduction for the real society, and it teaches us the importance of our lives.

The formation of families in my country have been mostly nuclear families for this past decade, which consist of parents and a child. In a nuclear family, a child tends to be selfish, and parents are apt to let their child do whatever he likes, which makes the child more egoistic. In the real society this kind of person is not acceptable, furthermore, it is difficult for him to adapt himself to the society. Children have to learn how they should convey their thinking in the society, and the extended family can take this role. For example, the family with members in a variety of ages teaches children that people have different kinds of mindset. Nowadays, school kids tend to hold the same way of thinking as their friends', moreover, they are afraid that they standout by possessing distinct thoughts from others. It is not negative at all to have an specific mindset and/or to discuss that with others who have a different one. There are grandparents, parents, and a child in addition to aunts or uncles in one family in an extended family, which benefits a kid in this way.

In an extended family, people can learn the life of a person. It is quite important for us to know how the life goes on because it is usually not close to us on a daily basis. Furthermore, to know the meaning of death teaches us the importance of ourselves and others' lives. Recently, as the nuclear family increases, a tragic event often happens in my country, which is a murder case. According to a research by a team of sociologists, the rate of murders by a younger generations has sky-rocketed, and most of them were raised in a nuclear family, where their both parents work throughout the day, or at least half a day. In an extended family, children can become aware of how importance the person's life is and how they should behave to others who might be weaker than them by observing their grandparents' death or by interacting with other family members like younger cousins.

All in all, although it might be challenging to have a big family with varied generations, I believe that growing up in an extended family is quite beneficial for people.

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Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 469 350
No. of Characters: 2098 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.654 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.473 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.542 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 110 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 63 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.96 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.389 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.332 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.492 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.177 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5